tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post3438478820905224122..comments2024-03-24T16:53:02.846-07:00Comments on Five Hundred Pound Peep: AbusersFive Hundred Pound Peephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-31887143114737181532016-08-13T10:22:48.847-07:002016-08-13T10:22:48.847-07:00Yes they all play martyr. I know my narcs have, I ...Yes they all play martyr. I know my narcs have, I am the horrible person who walked away but none questioned why I did. <br /><br />Wow this DARVO stuff sums up their worse techniques doesn't it...<br /><br />"DARVO<br /><br /><br />Explanations > Behaviors > Coping Mechanisms > DARVO<br /><br />Description | Example | Discussion | So what?<br /><br /> <br />Description<br /><br />When wrong-doers are confronted with their acts (which may be criminal), they show a pattern that can be abbreviated as DARVO This stands for Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender.<br /><br />The person thus denies having committed the offence, attacks the accuser and reverses the roles, painting themself as the victim and their actual victim as the actual guilty party.<br /><br />Two common types of denial are 'It didn't happen' and (if it cannot be denied) then 'It wasn't harmful'.<br /><br />Attacks can be violent and effectively abusive towards the accuser, with threats of legal action, attacks on credibility and so on. <br /><br />Example<br /><br />A person is accused of rape. When confronted with this, they deny that rape occurred, explaining it as consensual and acting in an outraged, affronted way, painting themselves as a hapless victim, whereas the actual victim with whom they had sex is described as a vindictive person who the accused later rightly spurned after discovering their malicious personality.<br />Discussion<br /><br />This is a pattern described by Jennifer Freyd in 1997 in her researches on 'betrayal trauma theory', particularly in the context of childhood abuse and sexual offenders.<br /><br />This pattern has links to the Drama Triangle when a third party (typically representing the law) seeks to confront the person with their crime. <br />So what?<br /><br />If confronting what appears to be a wrong-doer, then watch out for this pattern.<br /><br />Note also that a similar pattern may appear where the person actually is the innocent party. The best approach is thus to seek further evidence, whilst watching for signs of lying.<br />See also<br /><br />Games, Denial, Lying<br /><br /> <br /><br />Freyd, J.J. (1997) Violations of power, adaptive blindness, and betrayal trauma theory. Feminism & Psychology, 7, 22-32<br /><br />Veldhuis, C. B., & Freyd, J. J. (1999). Groomed for silence, groomed for betrayal. In M. Rivera (Ed.), Fragment by Fragment: Feminist Perspectives on Memory and Child Sexual Abuse (pp. 253-282). Charlottetown, PEI Canada: Gynergy Books"Five Hundred Pound Peephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-77319835685823151972016-08-13T09:17:30.385-07:002016-08-13T09:17:30.385-07:00I'm with Ollie. It wasn't a problem until ...I'm with Ollie. It wasn't a problem until people quit putting up with their crap. Read about Darvo. The disordered have their martyrs cloak ready for any and all occasions. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com