tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post6076458769133642327..comments2024-03-24T16:53:02.846-07:00Comments on Five Hundred Pound Peep: Having Kids is Too Hard Today: The Child Free MovementFive Hundred Pound Peephttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-78416952673160295072021-06-06T15:26:20.348-07:002021-06-06T15:26:20.348-07:00And if you had kids? What then? You’d suddenly be ...And if you had kids? What then? You’d suddenly be “important” to your family? I seriously doubt that. So, what IS in a heart?https://www.blogger.com/profile/00482423451947167280noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-41259811703774014742018-06-21T19:15:44.724-07:002018-06-21T19:15:44.724-07:00Hi I am glad you are glad you made the best decis...Hi I am glad you are glad you made the best decision for you to be childfree. Well I am near 50 and never had children. I hope you are around people who respect the child free lifestyle.Five Hundred Pound Peephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-313136513405130792018-06-21T11:11:33.555-07:002018-06-21T11:11:33.555-07:00Being childfree and 40 is the best decision I'...Being childfree and 40 is the best decision I've ever made in my life. I love everything about it....It's my life, my choices. And the freedom is the best, best part!!!!!!!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-33968560300400289982016-04-03T10:55:18.691-07:002016-04-03T10:55:18.691-07:00Hi, Peep. Rereading my comment above, I fear I wa...Hi, Peep. Rereading my comment above, I fear I was not addressing the main point of your blog post which I assume to be that poverty keeps people from having children they would otherwise have. I apologize. I usually keep my lip zipped on such subjects so when I can express myself, I tend to burst forth in full fury.<br /><br />Lots of poor people have children as you mention. Maybe poverty keeps the more conscientious, thoughtful sorts from having children. Nothing seems to stop women hellbent on having children from having children, especially not the good of the child.<br /><br />I tend to see things from the point of view of the child. Living in a rich family doesn't necessarily benefit a child who may see very little of that money anyway. No amount of money compensates for having cruel parents. As the Bible says, better a dinner of herbs in a poor house with love than a fattened ox without love. That's a very rough paraphrase. On the other hand, poor parents can be cruel too.<br /><br />On a cheerier note, I think a lot of parents are on the run. Withholding information, especially about sex, used to be a big source of parental power. That's not possible any more. When I started my periods, I knew absolutely nothing. Even then, my mother refused to tell me anything, saying that if I knew, I would just go out and do it. That must have been projection. I was terrified of the whole thing. That was the idea my mother had of me; I was just a little tart, about to go crazy at a moment's notice. I was eleven.<br /><br />I read a really interesting article in the UK online Guardian, 26 March 2016, titled I paid to have my daughter kidnapped. This Florida mother drugged her seventeen year old daughter and had her carried off to a sort of survivalist reform school in order to keep her from going to hairdressing school instead of university. According to the article, the daughter came back a reformed character, went back to being a little girl who never challenged her mother and went to university and onto a professional career. Of course, there is no input from the daughter. We must just automatically believe the mother is right because she is a mother. Interesting. Sounds like desperate times call for desperate measures for parents on the run, for parents who just want to be left to abuse their kids in peace. <br /><br />Beenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-81832011731493440522016-04-02T10:32:22.553-07:002016-04-02T10:32:22.553-07:00That's sad. Yeah what will happen to younger p...That's sad. Yeah what will happen to younger people as they can't afford apartments or families and see devastated lives? The "new normal" stinks. I know they have impossible demands on people now and telling them too bad you can't afford your baby stinks.Five Hundred Pound Peephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-49420582659531147322016-04-02T09:46:40.977-07:002016-04-02T09:46:40.977-07:00There is a ton of social pressure to have children...There is a ton of social pressure to have children and I marvel at the total inadequacy of some of these "parents". I was idly flipping through a book on eating disorders and found an entire chapter on anorexic mothers. This should be a contradiction in terms as starving women are infertile, at least under the wise rules of nature. These days anorexic women can get pregnant through the fertility clinics. The book was talking about the problems of the children who are competing with a major mental illness, who take second place to the "parent's" addiction and have a high chance of becoming an orphan in their teens and presumably an unpaid caregiver before that. This sort of selfishness boggles the mind. A lot of people just assume the presence of a baby turns any "parent" into a saint.<br /><br />People have lots of selfish reasons for having children like cementing a new relationship or just because everyone else is doing it. That doesn't mean they have any interest in young people or learning how to treat them competently. Childhood is an inconvenience and the boring parts of child raising are ignored in favor of the fun parts like competing with the other "parents" and turning the child into a human racehorse.<br /><br />An incredible percentage of kids are put on Ritalin and other drugs to make them as little trouble as possible. Dr Peter Breggin's videos points out the major neurological consequences of a childhood spent on legally prescribed stimulants.<br /><br />The interests of children and the interests of "parents" conflict in major ways. Children are interested in the outside world and finding out about it. "Parents" often lose all interest in the outside world, claiming the kids take all their time. Often the kids take very little time, between daycare, school and summer programs and Ritalin, but the "parents" have set up a private kingdom and queendom of their own and don't need to bother with the outside world any more. It boggles my mind how little interest "parents" have in the world their kids are going to live in. I would think "parents" especially would be concerned by issues like global warming. But the opposite is the case.Beenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-25563826397913636202016-04-01T20:42:52.567-07:002016-04-01T20:42:52.567-07:00I heard one today, it was interesting. A young co...I heard one today, it was interesting. A young couple having a baby was told they couldn't afford it. For he was only an apprentice and she didn't work. Otherwise, they would be loving parents. I know they don't have a lot of money, but to be told that, what did they expect them to do now with the baby on the way? Joan Shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07775873193806083833noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-84397566428338342522016-04-01T07:53:08.456-07:002016-04-01T07:53:08.456-07:00My parents whined and complained about how horribl...My parents whined and complained about how horrible children are, and I suspect this is true in many places now, that many kids as they are being screamed at think, "I'm never having children". I hated families by the age of 10. Add in the US lifestyle where there is only moving, loss, no money to pay bills, and people think NO WAY. I think even for Generation X and below the sheer logistics aren't there. There's no aunties and normal mother to help with the baby, no securely employed man. Some other cultures grandma helps with the babies as well as extended families but not for many. The break down of societal connections means less babies and having children. I know one engulfing narcissists who had two children who decided never to have children because they did see it as a "miserable" experience. She would whine and wail why aren't you having children where's my grandchildren? Their lack was at her feet. Families are no longer places of solaces for kids and then add in the divorce and broken homes in a lot of places too.Five Hundred Pound Peephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-63656086372103224152016-04-01T07:48:20.052-07:002016-04-01T07:48:20.052-07:00I agree go NC with people who put you down for bei...I agree go NC with people who put you down for being single or childless. Even in the churches I was treated as a freak for never having children even though my physical appearance should have given them a few hints while there weren't any. I noticed the church I left put "FAMILY FRIENDLY ATMOSPHERE" on their Yellow page ad, they didn't want any childless people.<br /><br />My family was sickening in its treatment of the childless. Aunt Scapegoat got it, and well my brother told me the last time I talked to him that my mother didn't consider me as important because I never had children and this was acceptable to him. Of course now with my medical neglect, guess whose feet we can lay that at.<br />Oh sure I have the flying monkeys who tell me to restablish contact even as they admit my mother and others treated me badly. They want me back in line for more. I was supposed to stand there forever and take it until the day I died just like Aunt Scapegoat and then get dumped in a box and called "rebel" and "blacksheep" and dishonored in death, since she's the first to be banned from the family cemetery. <br /><br />With class reunions, I am friends on Facebook with some nicer classmates, not close relationships more like acquaintances--my N parents made sure I had no close friends in high school, but I agree about the little psychopaths becoming bigger ones. The "don't hold grudges" crowd don't live in reality, my high school was more wealthy like my parents and the last reunion every dinner cost at least 100 bucks. I think its better not to go, it does validate abusers and it's doubtful they changed. That is one myth in society that most "will see the light" and become nice people. At competitive American high school reunions showing up being disabled 20 years and having no children or trophies to show off, is a recipe for a very bad time. Five Hundred Pound Peephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-18352095234751047872016-04-01T06:37:13.196-07:002016-04-01T06:37:13.196-07:00Can't help but to also wonder if stone-hearted...Can't help but to also wonder if stone-hearted families are more common than we realize, and so there may be a lot of kids who equate raising a family as a miserable experience. Too many less-than-halmark memories perhaps.Suehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12009191540139452049noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-21165546938902060142016-04-01T02:19:31.000-07:002016-04-01T02:19:31.000-07:00I count people putting me down for being single an...I count people putting me down for being single and/or childless as a red flag and a prompt to NC them. I actually went No Contact with one flying monkey in my family on that ground, along with his insisting that I should reestablish contact with my mother even though he admitted that she seemed "poisoned with hate". Funny logic, the latter.<br /><br />I decided to never have children for what I bet is the reasoning of many ACONs: One, I doubt my parenting skills given my upbringing. Two, if there is a genetic component to narcissism, I may be a carrier. Of the four people in my immediate family (counting myself), at least three are screwed up beyond repair.<br /><br />Also, Peep, I get you about school reunions. Tried it a few times earlier, and I think I will stay clear of future ones. I feel I have nothing in common with my former schoolmates. In my early 40s I am single and childless, I have no notable career (though I did have a satisfying job), or possessions to show off. Not that I'm complaining - by myself I'm quite content with where I'm at now. But I would feel utterly out of place with them.<br /><br />Oh, and one important thing: Above I was talking about my high school, where I was treated relatively normally by my peers. Now in my country's equivalent of junior high, I was severely bullied by my classmates for several years, and this class holds its own reunions. So when I went to their reunions, I noticed that those who once bullied me in school would today still abuse me given the chance.<br /><br />Little psychopaths grow up to be adult psychopaths, a fact my then therapist seemed not to understand. When I discussed with him whether or not to go to the first of these reunions - and I didn't want to go, thinking it fair to what I had suffered - he convinced me to go, told me that the abuse was not malicious but just part of their growing up, that I should not hold grudges for 15+ years, and all that. But now I know that what I did by going was validate the abusers, who as adults are still abusers, and I regret it. It would have been just and fair, and self-respecting of me, if I had refused to show up.Nenadnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-42966337412153043372016-03-31T12:56:47.877-07:002016-03-31T12:56:47.877-07:00They have to keep the economic collapse hidden. If...They have to keep the economic collapse hidden. If the younger generations knew how much they were being screwed with the student loans and inability to have family-supporting careers and life building wages, there probably would be a lot more "revolting" then the "owned" Occupy movement. I believe that was just a steam valve anyhow run by Soros. Its tiring that the media pushes this as a rich "selfish" entitled people just want to party and go on vacations instead of the truth being there's no money to support families anymore.Five Hundred Pound Peephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-54012853163160010162016-03-31T12:55:00.607-07:002016-03-31T12:55:00.607-07:00Me too. I saw this in the inner city of course. Th...Me too. I saw this in the inner city of course. The younger set have no money to do it anymore.Five Hundred Pound Peephttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05862707335431442713noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-23985646457828466752016-03-31T11:57:57.747-07:002016-03-31T11:57:57.747-07:00I think it is in vogue now to have children and le...I think it is in vogue now to have children and let the grandparents raise them. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-650289478442133391.post-70815961442273684992016-03-31T10:41:25.402-07:002016-03-31T10:41:25.402-07:00Dear Peeps and Friends, yeah, I wonder too, if the...Dear Peeps and Friends, yeah, I wonder too, if the real reason for no kids, is the same sort of rationale (LIE!!!!!) used by so many retIIIred people who are working low-wage jobs. Why can't people just brave up, and either tell the truth, or say nothing!Suehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12009191540139452049noreply@blogger.com