Monday, April 6, 2015
Better Call Saul: Jimmy Undermined by His Brother
There's a saying out there: "Make sure everyone in your boat is rowing and not drilling holes". I have watched some "Better Call Saul"s with my husband who is a fan and this episode resonated with me. Jimmy is a new lawyer and was actively working to join his brother's giant law firm and even managed to build a multimillion dollar case, and still the law firm would not hire him. He realized his brother who he had helped for years had destroyed his chances of ever being hired behind the scenes. What is even worse is Jimmy had helped this brother who had become mentally ill and afraid of electricity for years with being able to feed and take care of himself since he was unable to leave the house.
One thing about dysfunctional family members is, for the scapegoats or others, they want you to fail. They will drill holes. I think of my drill holes, my own family did, when they had connections to high level jobs including even decent middle class jobs within their govt. organization that hired even people without college degrees in the 80s and 90s. Then there was the time I was desperately looking for a teaching job and had experience where my mother had the connection to someone who was an education department big whig. Some will say people are not entitled to anything or this help, and this is true to a point but watch out if you have family members who are actively sabotaging you behind the scenes.
Many relatives do not want you to succeed. They want to keep you down in your lowly role. They do not want scapegoats to have any money. They enjoy having someone they can feel better then and lord over. My mother got absolute glee over my failures and over me being poor. She drooled at the idea of me being behind the proverbial shopping cart. In other words while they yell at you for being a loser, and poor or needing money, they make sure to do everything in your power to keep you there. Even at the gov't organization, half illiterate people who were friends were hired into my parent's place and into middle class jobs. I was denied.
I realized even to my horror how I was isolated and kept away from multiple people my parents knew in their work world, and even cousins, that both my siblings were friends with and knew. Facebook can be an education about the narcs, well before you go no contact and block them. I had Chuck- like sabotages done on my life. I fought tooth and nail even for the degree I did get--they were against me going to college at all and the one or two professional jobs I could scrape from the bottom of the barrel, but this is something scapegoats have to watch out for.
My student teaching was affected by my parent's abuse when I had to move home. I even suspect one relative of doing a Chuck like sabotage on my husband. I confronted her but she played innocent. These type of people do ruin lives.
That is what I find so astounding about your mother. That single act alone, not even mentioning anything else, that single act just astounds me. I hope she is taking enormous embarrassment over your no contact. Hope she is left trying to explain why that happened. Oh, she probably skated over it, like a narc would.
ReplyDeleteYou and your husband should be high on the hog with her connections in work related matters. Letting alone all the other things she did. She took care of the others though, she is evil beyond measure, I can't even say.
It is astonishing too. Even years ago my husband applied for jobs at the certain place and was tgurned down, but I was still in the fog. In my NC letter I point out how some can get jobs at a drop of a hat. Mine is never embarrassed, sad to say. I did find out she merely was not mentioning my name to anyone anymore, taking a big eraser to me like I did not exist.
ReplyDeletehttp://fivehundredpoundpeeps.blogspot.co.uk/2013/11/emotional-abuse.html
She is evil beyond measure.