Friday, August 7, 2015
Narcissistic Abuse: Attack of the True Self
That is what they go after our true self, our soul, conscience and insides given to us by God. They have definitely shut theirs down. Even before I knew about narcissism, I used to tell friends, my mother and father seem to be empty shells, no one seems to be home. This video resonated with me because I was hated and rejected from a very early age, it was not something that came later or with the teen years. They were angry at my creativity and soul. With narcissists, we all have felt that cold feeling. There is no mind to meet. No soul or emotions to communicate with. With my mother, I noticed she had no introspection by the time I was a teen and told people. There is "no one" to reach out for. Sadly this is something narcissists hold in common that coldness where no one seems home. This even overlaps with the "phonies" and "fakes", they are others who have shut down their true selves and have created a false "self" or mask to function in the world. Your flicker of light is definitely what they desire to snuff out. One thing to be mindful of is, if someone else wants to snuff out your light or creativity, that is someone to steer very clear of. The battle with narcissists is spiritual warfare. No doubt of it.
I played guitar and my mother thought it was stupid. I wrote a column for an on line relationship sight and she thought it was stupid. I played sports in high school and she thought it was stupid. I got certified to scuba dive and she thought it was stupid. She say on the couch all day long and never held a single job talking trash about her friends and making fun of the newscasters and how they all thought they were so much better than everyone else. Now that's stupid.
ReplyDeleteMine called every hobby and interest of mine stupid too from being an art teacher to having a stamp collection. Even being on the golf team was "stupid" and a waste of time and I had to beg for rides and used a very cheap set of golf clubs from a garage sale. Mine had a job but it was an easy gig always home by 4:30 in the afternoon and M-F, and worked at same place as my father. It wasn't breaking rocks, it seemed they had parties and food she made every other week. Of course watching their easy skating in the work world I was left totally unprepared for what that was like. Mine thought they were better then everyone else too. I love the people with the narc mothers, who call them lazy and scream "Get a job" misunderstanding modern economics who never have worked a day in their life.
DeleteI wonder if anyone can watch this with dry eyes, I can't. So true. They tried to obliterate us. I agree it is a spiritual abuse. And that MN mother's can't cope with that brilliant little light.
ReplyDeleteIt is absolute spiritual abuse. Mine also turned an entire family against me seeing me as nothing. I believe she will burn in hell for this alone. She will never repent. They long ago snuffed their own light out and hate ours. This is one reason you never see even a rich narc enjoy life at all, it's all a contest and screwing people over.
DeleteNormal people see human interactions as a zero sum proposition. They think in terms of cause and effect. Narcissists have something to gain or they would not go to such lengths to destroy people. You can't get the average person to see why they would sponsor such terrorism if there is nothing to be gained. No payoff. That's the point. Normal people can't relate because they are normal. You have to completely go to the dark side to get joy from hurting people for the fun of it. Like Smakintosh says Don't bring it up. Don't initiate the conversation about narcs. No one will believe you. Narcs are an anomaly. They are an abomination.
ReplyDeleteThey love to destroy people even if there is no money to gain from it even though there often is. People don't believe you. This is absolutely right, and even with friendships that are a few years old, it's better to keep your mouth shut if they had normal families and were loved. I keep thinking how that one ex-friend refused to believe me when a narc in the midst was telling endless lies. Even with proof right in front of her face and a second witness, she did not care. I think most are more comfortable believing narcs and throwing away the good people, it keeps them more comfortable, they will always pick the usually higher status narc over you. A friendship is over once they don't believe you. I made a giant mistake also showing this blog to that person. I suppose its better I discovered that someone is a narc defender and lacking empathy earlier rather then later on. I don't know that narcs are rare, I know they own most minds, and they win over the people who still have consciences. I do definitely agree, that no one will believe us. Only other ACONs and well even with them they have to be at a certain point in the healing process will believe us.
DeleteThanks Q. I was missing this piece of why I'm not believed. Because there is no reason for the terrible atrocities narcs cause. And I can't get anyone to believe that. I believe people don't have to have a reason , but other people don't believe that, that's the problem.
DeleteI never knew this till now.
I thought normal people knew this. Just like I did and I took it for granted that they did. I am shocked, I can't even say.
DeleteThere was always this, "Why would they do that for? What is the reasoning behind them doing that?" Then I would look at them and think, dumbass, you know they don't need a reason?
DeleteNow I know they don't know. Anyone want to share a margarita with me? This is a lightbulb moment for me.
Remember some don't want to know either. Many go along to get along and that means kissing narc butt. LOL I'm ready for a margarita too.
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