This video has it all...Let me list:
1. The doctors do tell you that you are going to die. I expected to be dead by my 30s and 40s, but trust me by teenage years, the fear is already there. Maybe some of them think fear motivates but I got confronted by a terrible doctor I had in my teens. He was a quack and misdiagnosed just about everything. He gave me the doom and gloom, "you are going to die" speech.
2. The hallway of doom in high school is in all our memories. I got phobic about walking down the hall, and would go to every class late, the teachers got used to it. Walking past snickering people gave me anxiety. She's right about the nicer ones holding their breath. Us fat people can tell when we are gaining or not, you don't even need the scale. People are always a little bit nicer with every pound lost.
3. I love the part where the thin girls, talk about how much they hate exercising, and how they want to ditch gym. They tell us fat people that every thin person is active, loves exercise and that's why they are thin. It's a lie. Some are, but many don't have to work to have their thin bodies, they just have them.
4. The psychotic habit of making self-conscience teenagers shower in front of each other drives many a teenager to madness. In high school, I wouldn't shower after gym, there were no private ones and I couldn't bear to be looked at. I still have dreams about the 8th grade giant shower, they expect us all to pile in at once. Those dreams and memories get mixed up with horrific scenes from the movie Carrie. I would skip showers, get in trouble and written up. High school didn't force them but junior high it was the rule that you take a shower. I wasn't super-obese in junior high, I remember wearing size 13/14 [at least 5 foot 10 inches by then] but it was fat enough for negative attention.
5. I relate to the part where she changes privately. Some girls were nice to me in high school, but I was very closed down from abuse. Life got strange for me befriending high school folks on Facebook, one bought some of my art. I did think back of what I missed given the extent of my abuse. This was hidden during those years, they just saw me as extremely shy and quiet.
6. Exercise was always harder being fat, you breathed hard, hurt all over and every movement seemed more complicated. I liked some physical activity but the body never cooperated. Lipedema was there by age 13. Every fat kid knows what it is like to be way in the back of the line of runners or joggers in high school and earlier. My gym teachers were merciful to me now wanting a kid to die in their hands because my lungs were crap even before I got really fat.
7. "Ivo" is a boy, just a very feminine looking one with long hair. The large kid is a body builder type. I always found the concept of weight gain powder to be strange, but they are trying to build muscle. The guy in glasses may be interested in her. You lack confidence to notice even positive attention. I cringe realizing some boys in college liked me, and how I treated them because I was so messed up with low self-esteem.
8. We had a couple fat boys in my high school, I remember jokes like that about the toilet, the boys would say to each other.
9. She's got the crummy bologna sandwich, while the girls have salads and the bodybuilder boy, chicken and rice. I related to this big time, and wrote an article about the bad food I had to eat when young.
10. School was always too hot. I remember roasting all the time except for around October-April.
11. Public weigh-ins are humiliating for fat kids. I still remember when I weighed 105 in 1st grade and the whole class was laughing at me.
12. It's interesting she hates the fat positivity ads too.
13. It's a great thing to me, that the video mentions metabolism. She says, "My metabolism isn't like other girls". The fat mother and grandmother are the norm. Most fat people have fat family members.
14. She is too worried about loose skin, she's a size and age where stuff could bounce back. I still have hanging skin from the 250lb/220 [now] weight loss which I know is weird being this supersized.
15. Weight loss ads are always in your face. I found the part interesting where she sees someone much fatter saying "I wish I could be like you", that happens too.
This video did a good job exploring the emotional landscape of growing up fat and female.
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