Sunday, April 15, 2018

I joined a gym


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I joined a gym last week. So far so good. I've gone twice. My 4 months of illness with all those viruses told me physically I am getting in trouble. I can use the stepper at the gym but can't walk fast enough yet for the treadmills, maybe later. I did do hand weights and pull weights and there are a few machines I can use. Some machines don't work yet, but enough did for me to have something to work with.  I am probably the most disabled person any gym in the world has ever seen. I did see this guy who weighs 650lbs who joined a gym on Facebook. He is obviously disabled but went down to the 500s.

This gym is okay with someone coming in on a walker who has to go very slow. My husband is helping me, making this possible. He joined too. He is able to do the aerobic stuff and get on the bicycles and helped me on and off the Steppers. I am using 10lb weights and the lightest stuff but will see where this goes. During non-housebound times, I told him we should plan on going twice a week. The gym is open 24 hours. The structure will help me. More art is done when I go to art class and probably more exercise will happen now as well.

 I am kind of old, and almost 50. I am not expecting miracles or magic weight loss but doing something is better then nothing. I am just trying to stay alive. I also thought well the PACE program has exercise equipment but I can't afford to wait 5 more years to get some exercise. My four months of illness really messed me up, my diabetes got out of control, with blood sugars ranging from the 150s-130s. I had a few 170s. I was so sick.

Another reason I joined the gym, is I can't walk well anymore to walk around for exercise. I hurt my ankle with a severe sprain last year and it never was the same. It is easier to go on a Stepper and hold on to the hand rails, though I am going very slow, then trying to walk on bumpy sidewalks with a walker and an ankle that feels weak.  I used to walk around the apt building and stuff like that but I hurt the ankle last year trying to walk to begin with and it just wasn't as possible..  I fear weight gain because of this. Remember my body wants to be 700lbs again. It is not normal. Even to get my diabetes down, is taking bearing hunger pains and eating foods like cottage cheese and grapefruits and avoiding as much pasta as possible. I have considered skipping meals but I get so sick, I was late eating lunch one day, and it hit 4:00pm and I literally felt like I was going to pass out but I keep emergency food on me due to the diabetes and ate some of it.

I did get the sugars down this week back down to the 120s and low 130s until the later leg infection came. The eating is always adjusted for this. It's not easy. Remember when I told you all I asked doctors to hospitalize me for weight loss, because I felt unable to lose any weight they always turned me down. I am scared at the amount of weight my body wants to hold onto.  CICO has failed me. I am just trying to do what I can. It troubles me, why won't they hospitalize someone who is not losing weight? They can watch me and feed me a controlled diet and figure out adjustments. One doctor said with Lipedema this severe, it's more complicated. I get so sick without carbohydrates but even now I am wondering if I should switch to a more Keto diet or an adjusted one.

I also am planning to go see a Rheumatologist very soon to get a handle on so many infections, fevers, chills, pain and fatigue. I am trying my best. It's time. Women with severe Lipedema can face multiple autoimmune problems. If I have Dercum's, that brings more risk for infections.

My MLD said I already do at home what a Lymphedema Rehab would do with me, and realized she was right. I am seen as one of their most compliant patients with leg wrapping and sugar record keeping.  The other doctors said my weight was "stable" and I was not sick enough to be hospitalized for weight. Maybe it'd be boring being in some hospital bed and their food is worse, they aren't worried about non-GMO food and avoiding MSG. I was 530 last year and 526 last month, and 513 in the middle of the year. It does remain frustrating. Some of the hard fatty tumors seem to be growing

Sometimes my body weight does weird things, I almost had major wardrobe malfunctions at the gym. I told my husband sometimes my underwear is too loose on some days it's from the constant weight changes. I have to wear dresses to the gym, but tried wearing these cut off spandex shorts but they were too loose from years ago. My body is shaped so funny, normal clothing just doesn't fit right. I will be wearing shorter dresses at the gym.

One odd thing about me, is I used to like lifting weights when I was a teen. Our gym class in high school had some weight machines. I found it fun to do. I did feel some of this feeling of fun coming back. My husband told me he used to run into college and did exercises, he was on the school wrestling team. It will be good for his health too.  I have told him this will be our new hobby. Exercise bought me some time you know, the PT helped me a lot from years ago.

The gym people have been friendly to me. No problems there. This gym specializes in "no judgement" which I like a lot. I did get a leg infection, this week, probably from over-activity in general, but do plan to go back to the gym as soon as it is possible. It was great to find a gym we both can afford now too.

13 comments:

  1. Strangely im having a wanting to punch our GPs in the face phase , they are shockingly useless but one had a go at me to lose more weight despite going down 4 clothes sizes in 6 months. Then the exercise lecture ..ffs i walk 6 miles every school day . You do get the impression that they never look past the fat coat of invisibility its just an excuse to not look any further into anything

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    1. Wow if you walk 6 miles a day you are getting a lot more exercise then a lot of people and why is he ignoring your weight loss, was this a new doctor. Yeah too many of them are fat biased.

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  2. Yayyy! This is truly going to be the start of a new life for you, I think :)

    Keep at it, try for 3/week and then if you only do 2 you'll still hit your goal..? Just a suggestion.

    Very proud of you for finally taking over your own health. Now YOU are in control and that's gotta feel pretty dang great, no? The sense of empowerment, I hope, is a confidence builder.

    Can't wait to hear your progress. Enjoy!
    (drink tons of water)

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    1. Thanks. :) I am writing down our exercise plans too, to keep track of how many times we lift weights etc. The leg infection did set me back but I plan to be back very soon--it is clearing up. I felt better the first day I was there, and believe this definitely will help.

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  3. Wow! Good for you. You're an inspiration for the rest of us.

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  4. I know from my own experience that, having grown up with dysfunction, those of us who were "trained" to put everyone else first find it hard to do things for ourselves. I think this is a wonderful thing for you. (I hope I'm making sense.)

    It's only recently that I've begun to put myself first and refuse to throw myself and my health under a bus to suit others. It's very inspiring to see others who have come from dysfunction break away from it too.

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    1. I agree, we weren't taught self care. I wanted to join the Y when I was a teen--a bus ride away and was refused. I had to fight to be on the golf team and was pressured to quit, so even when I was healthy enough to do regular physical exercise I was cut off from it, now I am going to do more for myself, today. I know health wise, I had to learn to protect myself to stay alive, so yes don't throw your health under the bus anymore for them.

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  5. Keep us updated! You can totally do this! It's normal to feel a litttttle overwhelmed at the beginning of starting a new gym but it will soon feel like a 2nd home.
    Seriously this is really great, Peep! :)

    :)

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    1. Thanks. Yeah it was scary. I know the cardio part is still a little scary but I go on stepper and GO SLOW as body can handle. I plan to go tommorrow and do weighs first. Still figuring out more machines and what I can add to the routine.

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  6. We have so much in common! I started this journey at 493lbs and after 10 weeks on Keto, I am down 30 lbs and feel so much better! My Lipo-Lymphedema is fighting me, but I am determined to win. Would love to keep in touch and encourage each other's progress. I too have a blog that you can check out - https://www.nicole2point0.com/ . Reach out and let me know if you want another cheerleader and partner in crime! I so get what you are going through!

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    1. Thanks Nicole I will check out your blog too. I am glad Keto is helping you too, and you are doing so much better. Yes Lipo-Lymphedema can be rough. Thanks so much. :)

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  7. The gym has gone well. I do have to work around heavy health stuff, regulating breathing even for weights which is almost like cardio to someone like me. I am at 5 minutes or so on the stepper but getting more used to it, and that I believe I will be able to build up. I do sets of 3 15 on several arm weights and started at lower weights but a couple I was able to add more. I do have to figure out how to "fit" or figure out which leg machine would work, beyond the cardio but I am working with what I can find with husband's help. During housebound time in summer, I know I will be going after dark if I am able to breathe okay outside, and working things the best I can.

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