Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Sinead O'Connor Attempts Suicide: Was She a Victim of Narcissists Too?

It is very sad to hear that Sinead O' Connor made a suicide attempt. I saw Sinead O'Connor sing in concert in 1990 at her peak. I never had heard such beautiful singing in my entire life and still remember this concert in detail. I have listened to her music for years.

She posted a new message yesterday:

"Her post on Monday was somewhat disjointed however it was clear she wanted to publicly rip her family members. O’Connor’s message implied she was still hospitalized.  
“Jake, Roisin, Jr., frank, Donal, Eimear, I never wanna see you again. You stole my sons from me. Then you had hypocrisy to come to hospital and then not be here when I wake and not pick up phone? I'm s--t to you. You're dead to me. You killed your mother. You stole my sons. You left me alone for twelve weeks! Why did I have to hear it was your hypocritical asses here while I was unconscious?? And now you're Gone and not picking up phone? You are child stealing murderers, I never want to see or hear from any of you again. Why were you here when you're the ones who put me here???? And where the f--k are you now??? Murderers. Liars. Hypocrites. All of you. You caused this.”"
 If you have been a fan of her music, you know something happened with her children where they were taken away.

One song Fire on Babylon speaks of her son being left with her abusive mother.

"She took my father from my life Took my sister and brothers oh I watched her torturing my child"

 This song is pretty obvious in speaking of early abuse.

 Sinead O'Connor for years talked about her "messed up" family. In this Spin article from 1991, she discusses how her family didn't like that she had become famous. Often that is one attribute for the scapegoat, get rich, get famous and you still aren't good enough. That says something scary about them right there.

In this other article where she responds to her brother in 1993 [stick with the cache on this one because a virus has been put on the normal link] she talks about her abusive mother, "My mother was very terrifying" while saying her father was "lovely" but failed to protect her.

Her brother backed her up in another statement in 1993:

"A few weeks later, O'Connor's brother gave a lengthy response, defending his father but echoing her about their mother, who died in 1985, and subjected her children to "extreme and violent abuse, both emotional and physical," he wrote. The next week, the singer responded: "Our family is very messed up. We can't communicate with each other. We are all in agony. I for one am in agony."

 It's been reported for years that Sinead had an abusive and violent mother, she ran away from home so much, that she was put in a Catholic reform school where the nuns gave her a guitar and got her into music.

  "O'Connor's mother – who would die in a car crash when Sinead was 19 – was a troubled, violent woman, and was also, the singer says now, a kleptomaniac herself who required her children to behave similarly. "

What kind of mother would force her own children to steal?

  She was definitely separated from her children.

Sinead O' Connor has been diagnosed with bipolar in the past though she has questioned this herself. The endless marriages including one that lasted only 18 days does point to some serious mental health problems. We know severe mental problems are rife among the famous for various reasons. This is a world most of us can't even imagine.

There definitely have been problems with depression and anxiety in her life and possibly other problems,  despite her world fame. I find myself wondering if the family is narcissistic, despite her mental troubles, there are people who become ill because of what they have faced. Something is really wrong when a world famous musician can't even get any breaks from a family.  Abuse does break people.  As I have written on here multiple times sometimes the soul murderers succeed.  I have seen supportive families even when someone has faced severe mental illness, her family does not seem among their number. What happened with her own children? Her mental problems could have driven them away but what else happened?

 ACONs who were scapegoats who stay relatively mentally intact, are the fortunate ones in the crucible of severe abuse. Sometimes I have said to close friends, "Aspergers saved me and kept my identity intact. It gave me an intellectual refuge so they could not break me down and disintegrate my personality." Even if Aspergers caused me major problems, that was on big positive. Other ACONs may find other places of refuge, including friends and finding someone who loves them outside of their family.

One thing that happens to singers is when they age, their voices can deteriorate. This happened with Sinead and you can hear the changes even 10 years ago as her voice went deeper. She also recently had a hysterectomy. Mid-life for the abused ACON and someone who has faced emotional problems their entire life can be a crisis point. For those of who have escaped and admitted there is no chance of change among our families. I know my own mid-life crisis point of facing my own possible early death from my disabilities and health problems necessitated my breaking away and going no contact. In my case, it had as much to do with saving my emotional life as well as my physical life.

I find myself thinking..."If only someone could tell Sinead about no contact and not investing time in people who have no love to give you".  Her message to her family is even more sad today:

"A distressing post written today says: 'You came to the hospital to see me on life support. You left before I woke and you haven't been back. Please why are you doing these things to me?? I need you. I need your love.'
It goes on: 'Come and tell me why this is all happening. Come and tell me I'm loved. Come and tell me I'm wanted and cherished.
'Been missing you all for weeks. To hear that you were here and left was agony. Now I am utterly alone. Please. Please love me. Please come to the hospital and spend time with me and help Fix all this. Please. I'm. Begging you. Don't leave me so frightened and alone.' 
The singer was found by police on Sunday afternoon after claiming she had taken an overdose."

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3340813/Sinead-O-Connor-stable-hospital-unconscious.html#ixzz3t5EELzyZ
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It's sad to me watching her beg her family for love.  It's enough to bring one to tears. Many of us ACONs have been in that boat. I even asked my narcissists before I walked, "Why don't you love me?" and "Why do you hate me so much?" This is a trap an ACON can fall into, seeking love where there is none. It is a trap that almost destroyed me before I escaped. I don't seek the love of the narcissists anymore and don't want it. I realized they are incapable of any love. My own love and wishes for what could be are done.  Just showing up to the hospital when someone is unconscious and not even attempting another visit after they have woken up is pretty cold. I had my own times where no one but my loving husband was there for me in the hospital when I almost died of leg and other infections. So her pain is more then believable.

Many ACONs face having children taken away or influenced by narcissists and others to have nothing to do with them. If there are mental problems in the mix, these definitely can be used for smear campaigns and to teach the children and adult children not to have compassion but only shame and dismissal.

Remember when Sinead O'Connor had her debates with Miley Cyrus, and she told her, how the mentally ill are treated like dirt?  She stated "When you admit to mental illness, you are treated like dirt". This is very true. This is absolutely correct. Her family's reaction to her mental illness seems to be the absolute same as narcissists. Narcissists are cold and cruel when it comes to ALL medical problems and mental problems even more so.

One thing I am reading comments on the articles, and most people don't have sympathy or compassion for her. One commenter even wrote if your whole family has turned it's back on you, it's your fault! They are mocking her displays of emotion instead of having any understanding for what she has gone through. ACONs are more then familiar with how that works too. I do fear for her, I am praying that someone intervenes who knows the truth about narcissism and what the solutions are. Losing her children too had to be horrendous. Why didn't her cold family and exes even allow for supervised contact? We may not know the whole story there, but something is very wrong.

One thing I always respected Sinead O'Connor for is she has spoken out against child abuse. When she shredded the Pope's picture in 1992, she was right about the child sexual abuse that was being hidden at the Vatican. In the song lyrics she changed the word "WAR" to "CHILD ABUSE" and then ripped up the Pope's pictures. When the sex scandals in the Catholic church broke in 2002, it vindicated her warnings. The world didn't want to hear the truth.


  1. If she is crazy someone made her that way.

    1. I agree! I think her family sounds "crazier" but the "truth telling" types definitely get put up a few notches.

  2. Definitely aspects of this article applies to. http://fivehundredpoundpeeps.blogspot.com/2015/10/youre-crazy-when-scapegoat-is-labeled.html

    My narcs went to town over my Aspergers [more a neurological condition] and depression anxiety troubles, can't imagine worse more disabling mental health conditions among narcs.

  3. Such a great artist! I am really sorry to hear about her suicide attempt.