What incredibly good advice. I recently finally quit grieving the loss of my marriage to an abusive narcissist or whatever horrible Cluster B diagnosis best accounts for his depravity (sometimes he seems to fit more than one).
It is good advice. I have to apply this to my whole family I walked away from. I still can get those stray thoughts, "well maybe if I explain this to them..." "or that one" blah blah blah. It simply doesn't matter. They never valued how I felt anyway so don't waste the time, the energy or the trying. I just shut that crap right down. Any of those assholes could have wrote me a one or two page letters apologizing and never did. So why should I go back on my knees to them. Yeah some of the Cluster Bs got a few diagnoses. I am glad you are feeling better and have quit grieving the loss of your marriage to an abusive narcissist. I feel bad about 40 people being lost out of my life, but they all chose my mother, I did give each and everyone a chance to hear me out [those who were adults] but it didn't work. So there's nothing more I can do.
Remember that these toxic people are accomplished thespians...and only people who are intimately involved with them can understand the apparent lack of empathy and remorse they exhibit. People who don't spend a lot of time around your mother probably really don't know what she is. They can act so normal. Oh, and they lie like rugs!
I agree JillB, she acts nice to these various cousins and others and it's only contact once or twice a month so she can put on the act. Of course that makes someone like me "look crazy" because they see her as a nice woman who buys them presents. Yeah they act so normal and nice to their non-scapegoats and can lie so well.
What incredibly good advice. I recently finally quit grieving the loss of my marriage to an abusive narcissist or whatever horrible Cluster B diagnosis best accounts for his depravity (sometimes he seems to fit more than one).
ReplyDeleteIt is good advice. I have to apply this to my whole family I walked away from. I still can get those stray thoughts, "well maybe if I explain this to them..." "or that one" blah blah blah. It simply doesn't matter. They never valued how I felt anyway so don't waste the time, the energy or the trying. I just shut that crap right down. Any of those assholes could have wrote me a one or two page letters apologizing and never did. So why should I go back on my knees to them. Yeah some of the Cluster Bs got a few diagnoses. I am glad you are feeling better and have quit grieving the loss of your marriage to an abusive narcissist. I feel bad about 40 people being lost out of my life, but they all chose my mother, I did give each and everyone a chance to hear me out [those who were adults] but it didn't work. So there's nothing more I can do.
DeleteRemember that these toxic people are accomplished thespians...and only people who are intimately involved with them can understand the apparent lack of empathy and remorse they exhibit. People who don't spend a lot of time around your mother probably really don't know what she is. They can act so normal. Oh, and they lie like rugs!
ReplyDeleteI agree JillB, she acts nice to these various cousins and others and it's only contact once or twice a month so she can put on the act. Of course that makes someone like me "look crazy" because they see her as a nice woman who buys them presents. Yeah they act so normal and nice to their non-scapegoats and can lie so well.
Delete