The Anger of Severe Obesity

I felt heavily annoyed when I got on a scale and figured out, where the weight was at.

I was getting my knee looked at the doctor's, thank God I can almost walk normally now, and noticed the scale only went up to 500lbs but hopped on hoping to get happier news. I leaned a couple fingers on the table, and it flashed 506, but who knows?  I was 520 around 4 months ago. I thought finally I would see a number with 4 in front of it, for once in my life.  

Most scales when you are severely obese never work anyway. I would say I have encountered only TWO scales in my entire life, that did any proper weighing, one at Weight Watchers and this endocrinologist's with a 700lb limit and wide standing area.

I had been...


more active...[one of the reasons my knee went all kafooey beyond the fall....


eaten less food due to the combined factors of economic and abdominal distress


eaten less food due to allergy problems growing worse


taking all my thyroid pills and other medications


eaten salad and apples for snacks.. [other continued dietary tweaking--I boil even chicken sausages to get the fat off]


and well here I sit. Still fatter then crazy.

I sometimes wonder about the severe effects that the condemnation and horrors of severe obesity has done to me. Sometimes I feel like I will go mad between what I am TOLD, and what the body does. It's like I am expected to believe lies when the reality I live is so different. I found myself in a fit of pique telling my husband, "It's a load of hooey, all this eating affects weight thing, MAYBE they really have nothing to do with each other!"

Yesterday, I got hungry, and because I was away at a meeting from home and away from all food, and even had prepared with a snack, a salad of dark greens with a little meat on it, I sat there, with the hunger pains rumbling through me, and felt like my body was "the enemy".What could I do? For years I have trained myself to "take the hunger" and eat if forced to if the blood sugar is really taking a nose dive, but that has not mattered one ounce either.

Everyone who is fat will admit that when pressed, even if size acceptance wants us to be happy and fat, that having a body that does nothing you tell it to do makes you hopping mad! I never have been in "control" of this body.  Why do people think body control is a given? It does what it wants. Sometimes I feel like my own body MOCKS me. Like the Nelson of the Simpsons going "HA HA!" you think you can do anything about it?"

I tell myself be happy, don't be angry. But it's hard when they always put it in your face. This is going back to my voicelessness theme on this blog.  I feel even more irritated at the grocery store, watching thin people with bags of M&Ms, sugar water-faux juice and bag after bag of potato chips in their grocery carts, then I saw this fat woman, she had salad in hers.

Oh I did get the "your weight is crushing your cartilage of your knees" speech though there is no permanent damage from the doctor but found myself thinking,

"What am I supposed to do about it?"

Economy Crashing? Blame the Disabled!

This article made steam come out of my ears the other day...

Job disability a headache for U.S. recovery

While one of the corporate minions in this article mutters about "lost skills" during a gap in one's work history that is a misnomer, everyone who has ever applied for jobs, knows they go nuts if there is even a 6 month gap, for someone taking care of an ill relative or even taking time off to travel, this is just something else they take advantage of, can't have one of the hamsters jumping off the wheel even for a break!

Trillions for wars, and they want to expand the whole Pax Americana thing globally by the way....

Trillions for the bankers in the banker bail-outs

Manufacturing shut down in America, jobs outsourced, so basically the majority of our past industry has been shut down.

but the collapse of the economy is blamed on the disabled!

Give me a break.....

I concede that now since we have millions of unemployed that those who are on the unhealthy edge and realize they aren't getting job because they aren't young, fit or dare I say "perfect" enough anymore according to the corporatists, the disability system is being overwhelmed.

What else would happen in a society where there is NO PLACE for millions of people? They are lying to you about the economy, and they are playing the game of blaming the most vulnerable, to cover up their greed! Whose realizing what is really going on? It is so very few. They own the media after all, they can convince the whole country and have done so with ease that the cause of their troubles, is granny and that disabled person over there.

I warned a few people, it may not be there the way things are going soon. Be very careful. If you can't breathe well or know that trying to work would hospitalize you, apply but if you are on the fence healthwise, and have other options do explore those. The rhetoric against the disabled is getting BAD out there.  

Anyhow this article made me very angry. I know they got most of the populace believing most on disability are parasites. I was so angry yesterday after seeing this, I went off on a tear saying to husband, "Why didn't I ever have a job when I was young with a living wage and more importantly AVAILABLE HEALTH INSURANCE?"

No end to US obesity epidemic, forecast shows

No end to US obesity epidemic, forecast shows

Sadly why they cry the warning nothing will be done. The obesity is the outcome of an overly stressed "sick" society.

Today, just over a third of U.S. adults are obese. By 2030, 42 percent will be, says a forecast released Monday.

That's not nearly as many as experts had predicted before the once-rapid rises in obesity rates began leveling off. But the new forecast suggests even small continuing increases will add up.

"We still have a very serious problem," said obesity specialist Dr. William Dietz of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Worse, the already obese are getting fatter. Severe obesity will double by 2030, when 11 percent of adults will be nearly 100 pounds overweight, or more, concluded the research led by Duke University.

Instead of screaming, "there is a problem!" they need to realize the "solutions" are not working.

They can't keep yelling ALERT ALERT, while on the back end allowing the food corporations to pour the high fructose corn syrup into the food and the endless toxins. They can't keep blaming people on this hyper-responsibility fix, because blaming people isn't working either. They can't keep blaming people during the time of a failing economy. Reading the comments on that article, most are awful.It's a scary time to be fat.

Subway Fat Seats in a Foreign Country

I think it's great that they are thinking of the fat people there...

There are a few places doing an OK job in terms of fat people, newer medical facilities do put in couches and restaurants are doing better...but most public transportation in America? Forget it! I used a big public transportation system in a huge city, it was a nightmare.

Subway Fat Seats in Brazil

I am actually considering telling the local library, we need better chairs for fat people here, I went to another room, where they hold meetings and dragged one out because the other ones are narrow.

Get me a fat seat, and make the fat seats a bit higher if possible. I LIKE this idea. Ignore the low-thinking people who think "ha ha so, funny." I've been without a decent seat so often, I do not even care if the chair has a giant FAT PERSON HERE sign above....


SUBWAY FAT SEAT.

Getting more sleep helps to dampen obesity genes

If you tend towards being fat, never take a third shift job, trust me on that one. Remember my 400lb weight gain, a big chunk of that came when I was put on third shift, I had to take that job or end up homeless....When I was young, I was seriously sleep deprived, too much restaurant work, not enough sleep, and later too many pieced together jobs and bad schedules. This is another reason I think the lower classes tend to be higher in weight.


Getting more sleep could dampen effect of obesity genes

The results suggest that shorter sleep provides a more permissive environment for the expression of obesity related genes,” study leader Dr. Nathaniel Watson said in a statement. “Or it may be that extended sleep is protective by suppressing expression of obesity genes.”

Just how sleep interacts with the body’s weight gain processes remains unknown, but it could have something to do with sleep deprivation triggering a rise in stress hormones that increase appetite, decrease metabolism, and encourage the accumulation of fat around the waist.

What does this mean in a society that prides itself on as little sleep as possible? That is something that definitely needs changed.

Fear From Fat: The Latest in The Fall Saga

Being this fat can be like living in a cage.

Today I was struggling with trying to get care regarding my knee. For some reason my house call doctors, did not want to come visit me, even though their website promises 24-48 hour sick calls and X-ray services. I found myself asking the office "gatekeeper" who for some reason seems to despise me, even though she has never seen or met me, and I have remained polite, "Do you offer X-ray services?" anymore. I tried to explain my fall had been a week ago, and my knee had relapsed but such nuances just seemed LOST. If I needed the ER I would have already been there, huge bills and all. Note to the doctors who are even nice people and this one is, get rid of the grown-up hall monitors, who make life miserable for everyone who must call a medical office.

I had my husband call them and finally called the local free clinic, for an appt, and also an orthopedic doctor who takes Medicare, even if knee gets better, I need to serious deal with my rapidly declining height. I feel like the medical world is so cold. I know they are "scientists" and the rest but can there be a little bit of *pretend* empathy? My husband did call for me and they did later send in an anti-inflammatory. The fear I had of losing all mobility has gripped my being like tendrils of ice wrapping around the hurting knee.

Obviously I can walk since I am sitting at my computer, and I did go do dishes, one thing being this weight, you better learn to TAKE the pain, or you will be in your bed for good, the fears of losing mobility or becoming bed ridden are IMMENSE and GREAT. I think people who have worse injuries, or lower thresholds for pain, do end up in bed. I do not blame them. My threshold isn't that good, though fear fuels my engine a little bit. You know pain is bad when you are crying just because it hurts so much.

My husband did step up and helped me. Thank God for him. He got me my medication, did most of the dishes, and chores, and helped be a spotter in the shower...[yes I am too afraid to shower alone right now with the knee this messed up]

I know this is one part of being fat when you are in the great weights, that is one of the hardest, the possible falls and the outcomes. The weight does not help. I almost flew out of a car once with a broken door when the driver turned a corner, save for the seatbelt. The gravity of weight only pulls you down.

Add to the Class Warfare Via Obesity Files

Don't think it does not exist.

If one visits places like Indian Hill and Manhattan vs. Appalachia, or a poor small town in Wisconsin, one is going to see different obesity rates. I can see the future now, a thin, well-heeled, corporate "professional class" vs. the fatter less trim, and "together" poorer class. Oops that already exists now! Silly me.....

"Why Being Overweight Could Earn You a Lower Salary"

The corporate classes actually expect very thin women, I have noticed even average types who may run size 12, 14, 16 seem to be blocked from the boardrooms too.

Now if you want to see an article to tie into the one above, check this one out...

"Thin Women Earn More then Average Women"

Yeah something is really wrong with that, with the difference being $16,000!