Friday, February 10, 2012

What Do I Make For Dinner?

You won't find anything like this to eat in my town....

It's getting harder to figure out what to eat.

I really am unhappy with the quality of food where I live, I feel like my access to good food has become limited, it improves during the spring and summer months. But there is too many times, I am just eating whatever I can afford or my husband can scrounge up. The town we live in, if you do not want Chinese food, or cheese or MSG laden subs, pizza, or hamburgers and don't have 50 bucks per meal per person for the more exclusive restaurants, this is an absolute culinary wasteland. Oddly this isn't just my imagination, a few online even agree.

The guy from Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives would be bawling his eyes out to see the greasy french fries and limpid chicken sandwiches they call food around here. In other words, unless you are rich, they phone it in. And there's no health food store or deli in this place, which just astounds me as I lived in a little ho-dunk middle of nowhere rural town that even had a health food-co-op right downtown.

Today being sick and housebound from cold, I told my husband to get me salad off the grocery store salad bar which he did, lettuce, carrots, beets, peas, fresh mushrooms, some pieces of cut up chicken, and I ate some of that and saved half for tomorrow, and ended up eating some of his frozen pizza--[the one brand with no MSG] except in my case, I peel all the cheese off, which can be like doing pizza surgery before I eat it, but thoughts of "white flour" alert" goes through my head. The night before as I was ill and tried to figure out what to cook, I told him get me some chicken tenderloins and I made that with veggies to put in some tortillas. Why was I cooking dinner at 11:00pm? It sometimes becomes a task I put off and I think my habit of snacking on half of dill pickles or even occasional fruit like grapes to stave off hunger is doing more damage then good. Why can't I find something healthy to eat in this place without having to dedicate at least an HOUR to cooking?

It's getting harder to afford food and put it together and with all the food allergies to even figure out what to eat in the first place. One thing I have noticed with cash, to buy boatloads of veggies or fruit, to make stir frys or make an Amy's meal, its far easier but the short times, even finding something I can afford to eat is hard. Some may say why didn't you make your own salad, I did with dinner the last two days, from scratch and ate lots of chopped up cucumbers and oranges, but trying to figure out what to eat is hard and getting worse. Does anyone else face this?

It's getting bad. Sometimes I dread when my husband comes up to me, "What are we going to have for dinner?", and if we are broke and on the last 20 dollars, my answer is often "I do not know.", lately is has been "I do not care!". There are times in one's adult life where they wish they weren't the cook in the household and someone else could worry about it for a bit. Don't tell me to tell the husband to cook, he is already running too many errands, my recalcitrant body demands, even in this cold weather. Lately I see eating as a nuisance, something I almost do out of habit to keep the fuzzy vision, hunger pains and rest away from me. Most food is gross to me. Are My taste buds are dying with age? Maybe I'll eventually lose more weight because all of this has just made me lose my appetite more.

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