Saturday, December 17, 2016

According to Narcissists: Positive Thinking Will Fix Everything




I was told by a troll, that I need to get a more positive attitude, and it will supposedly change my life. My legs will become normal and I'll be thin and my bank accounts will be full. Heaven will unfold and singing will reign across the land. My husband will get hired with full benefits at a job paying him 6 figures. My house will look like Martha Stewart's. My art career will blossom. I will have nothing to complain about. Positive thinking and goal setting will have saved the day. No longer will I be a depressive semi-goth Eyore lamenting about my life on my dastardly navel gazing blog. 

Maybe I'm too old, but I've heard this BS for decades. It never worked.  Mrs. Curses promised me miracles via her deliverance. A Project friend promised me happiness via more volunteer work even though I had volunteered for yeas and fixing what she criticized. Gwen Shamblin and other diet gurus promised me a thin body if I thought the "right thoughts". Weight Watchers promised me weight loss if I ate "healthily".  Pastors told me I would be blessed and my husband would get a great job if I just removed all sin from my life. Sorry, it's time to live in reality now. I am no longer interested in false promises and being told to be someone else to "deserve" anything. Want to fix me? Go find another sucker.

 Narcissists always use that as a go-to plan. It's a hammer being used on a lot of heads now and it is what has replaced empathy. Instead of people feeling any 'empathy' they have been indoctrinated to believe that any suffering is 'self-caused'. Their instant reaction is to shame and blame anyone who confronts their world view or narcissism in general. Share any troubles, and these types go to town. They would never bare a soul on a blog, they don't have one.

The shaming for not being positive enough is one of their tools. The constant focus on criticism never lets up. They want you smiling and silent.  People who have no consciences are not bothered by messy things like emotions like sadness or despair, or nostalgia or even longing. Emotions piss them off. Every scapegoat raised in a narcissistic family can attest to this. They slapped us hard for crying saying "We will give you something to cry about" but they also at times smacked smiles, laughter and joy off our faces too. 

They want you to shut up. This is why a blog full of emotion pisses narcissists off. They get angry at those who may talk about what they have been through. Blogs full of self reflection are called "selfish", these are the types of people who say "Everyone's got problems" while having no empathy for anyone's problems. They would never share their problems. That breaks the narcissist code of never having vulnerability. Everything is a contest to a narcissist. That is why they compete and even seek to destroy their own children. So when they preach positivity to people realize there alone it is a cup of poison. There's not one damn positive thing about them. Even their preaching of being positive is fake. It's another mask.

Narcissists want us to wear masks too. They hate people who refuse. I refuse. Queen Spider and my father, wanted me to wear masks. My father actually at one point screamed at me, "You need to conform or no one will never accept you". There I was rejected as both Aspie and personally. Every crap narcissist I walked away from demanded the wearing of masks. There was no honesty in their world. Hidden emotions and lies ruled the landscape. Fake friends who try to control your emotions are angry at your failure to wear a mask. A troll showing up here demanding that I wear their mask of forced positive thinking and goal setting, is just one in a long line. Our narcissistic parents were angry that we did not wear the mask of pretending they were loving parents. A cartoon that is honest and says "I hate my mother", sent one zombie narc over the bend. The troll could have been Queen Spider. Who knows. All I know is they all speak the same, their message is the always the same.

It's easy for them to say "Paste the smile on your face". Our entire culture enables narcissistic messages like this, where anyone who faces any problems is told it is their fault. This is why a narcissist troll can come here and feel justified in telling a disabled woman, with multiple health problems, "you just haven't been positive enough, it's all your fault." Even the sneers about me talking about "the man" putting me down is just the words of a narcissist where the corrupt oppressive system serves them. They hate activism and anyone who questions the system. In that alone they are pod people who preach boot-licking to the system that rewards their narcissism. To narcissists politicians are the good guys who "succeeded". Succeed at all costs.

What jerks like this don't realize is many of us scapegoats, smiled for decades and all it did was get us kicked in the teeth.  We already were "nice" and "positive" for years. We always gave the benefit of the doubt to whoever we can as we got exploited and abused.  We didn't realize that we were just opening ourselves up for predators.I used to think that if I am a nice enough person that people will like me and I will become "well-loved".  For many years I was a master of the "fawn" response to abusers.  Even now I have to work against the indoctrinated reaction of becoming silent when someone insults me. I tried very hard to be "nice".  All it did was get me kicked in the teeth. 

The narcissists never worry about being "nice", they are nasty to everyone and consider their words superior and law. Their sheer arrogance shines off every word they speak. They never self correct or ever ask themselves if they could be wrong. That is the trait of every narcissist out there. They consider themselves perfect. Their world is nothing but criticism for the "lesser beings" around them.

Queen Spider never worried about being nice. She was nice to those when it served her, and got her glee inspired smears off her concocted cruelties. Trying to be positive around narcs, is something that just puts you in thicker fog. They get away with more. You go to sleep living in denial. Every scapegoat went through that "make nice" phase, where you patted down troubles, and shut down mind and emotions to pretend everything was okay after being hit and yelled at. You ignore the sabotage in the room as you smile and hustle to help them in the kitchen and make them paintings, imaging yourself breaking through a hard heart to the soft person inside. There is no soft person inside. You've been fooled. You can be nice and positive until the cows come home, it's not going to change a damn thing. 

If anything scapegoats have to light a match to the "be nice" people pleaser crap and learn to stand up for themselves. Standing up for yourself is what gets you ahead in this world. We have to be careful not to become like the narcissists who only care about themselves, but the last thing any scapegoat needs is more shame, blame and criticism where they wake up with their head down.

One of my rules for life that has been developed is I am not longer going to allow anyone to tell me how to feel or who to be or what to think. If people think I am depressing, or full of bad news then they can go watch the Oprah channel. There's plenty of blogs with upper middle class and wealthier women, talking about their endless vacations and "self actualization", go find one of those to make sure you are never challenged. No one is forcing you to read. I think people are tired of Polly Anna crap and being told to smile anyway as the system grows more corrupt. People are sick of being told things are true that are not true.

 If I am a bit depressive and look at the dark-side of life too much, tough, I was made this way.  I'm not going to mold myself for you or anyone else.  It's who I am. The same emotional flow that makes a good painting also is one that looks at reality. I don't want your unicorn candy dreams. They are full of crap. They just depressed me more. Shove your "positive thinking" where the sun doesn't shine.

The whole "positive thinking" stuff is to keep the narcissistic supply flowing for the narcissists in charge.  It's societal demands that you wear a mask. I think more people are interested in dealing with reality. By the way there's no real joy in faking it. Real joy is found in honesty and in being an actual human being.  Real friends are found among those who are real, and I'm thankful for the friends I've met through this blog. I'm tired of the fakes who want me to be fake too. They don't wish us anything good. They just want censorship and masks.

31 comments:

  1. To me it's kind of like bursting into flames and having some braying jack ass come by telling you to put yourself out you are on fire. And you just want to say WOW! Why didn't I think of that? It's so obvious now. I would have never though of turning a garden hose on my self. Thanks, that was the perfect thing at the perfect time.

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    1. LOL yeah that is what it amounts too. They come along and say get the garden hose out, and you've already tried to turn 20 of them on and have thrown a bucket of water over yourself but the fire is still burning, and according to them it's all your fault. I worry that offline, I'm more into avoiding people outside the closest friends and husband because all they do is judge me anyway. Focusing on others can be enjoyable, but people do eventually wonder why you aren't saying much.

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  2. Positive thinking is everywhere. Maybe in a work environment, trying to get through the day, it is better to keep your chin up, but not with everyday life. I think that is deluded thinking, thinking that positive thinking can get you anywhere, but more misery. But it does help me through a day of work.

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    1. I know at work, one can't cry on the factory floor or lament life over chopping salad or teaching a lesson, but I agree with you, that positive thinking in itself can bring more misery. With work, I used to like jobs best where the task itself could take me away. Not too boring but active enough where my focus was on that. Art can do that for me.

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  3. If you have to remove sin from your life to get ahead I might as well crawl in a hole and pull it in behind me.

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    1. Me too, and I say that as a Christian.

      I'm in a strange place right now having left the churches for good. [leaving the IFB church system and getting away from the spiritual abuser]

      Whistle by the grave yard land, where supposedly avoiding sin, will keep the trouble away.

      The churches back up the narcissists in the oppression. "Bad" girls and boys don't get loved and have bad things happen to them.

      I am planning some religious topics here soon but I am thinking about some stuff that is kind of intense. Even the idea of prayer, as the constant begging in one's mind to keep the "bad stuff" away, is kind of worrying me.

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    2. I would like to hear more about how we are supposed to live. And how was Jesus as a person, that even prostitutes would find him as someone that they wanted to talk to. How is that even possible? I see these huge mega churches lead by a superstar of a pastor, and wonder how that fits in with bible teaching.

      I also learned, too, that prosperity, means being content in this moment, and that is a tough challenge, even tougher to find a church that would help me understand that. To me, they preach discontentment, otherwise why would we use prayer as begging? Ok, off my soapbox now.

      I also read in my bible, that teaching is supposed to come only from God, for God is jealous of us being taught by anyone else but Him. I don't get that. And I can't remember where in the bible that is. Just only teaching and admonision is only to come from him. Our church has "devotional's" not teachings, I think in respect of that. Ok, off the soapbox now.

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    3. I don't know how to remove sin from my life, I might swear here and there, but use the lord's name in vain, my skin crawls.

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    4. Yes Jesus talked to everyone. There is that one bible verses about giving the lowliest person the higher seat at the banquet. Not like todays churches where if you aren't dressed right or don't look the part, you don't fit in.
      Interesting question about praying. Yes with all the begging.

      agree about using Lord's name in vain vs. swearing.

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  4. Hi Peep. Just when I think I've seen your "best work", you come out with your "best work ever"! This has to be the most complete responsive post to their manufactured shame and need to humiliate that I've ever read. This piece pretty much says it all. :D

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    1. Thank you RazedbyPD. I appreciate it greatly. :)

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  5. I see this similarly to how you do. If you're thinking positively (ie 'hopefully') or negatively (ie 'despairingly') it means you're swinging from one type of thinking to another while getting absolutely nowhere. It's a sign of helplessness/powerlessness. I spent 20 years seriously ill with OCD, depression and panic attacks but on the outside I was one of the most 'positive' thinkers you'd come across: which basically meant I was running away from my own feelings. I got rid of my emotional disorders 10 just over 10 years ago by deliberately going into my intensely painful emotional states and just staying there until I'd sorted them out - I developed a philosophy of 'going into to come out of' and eventually became naturally happy as a by-product of allowing myself to feel what I was really feeling rather than trying to enforce happiness on myself. These days if people ask I tell them I don't do positive or negative thinking - I do practical feelings work. Reality is the thing to do (I'm now one of those horrible people who, if you ask me how I am, I'll actually tell you the truth as briefly as possible). Our lives are a mixture of pure luck (good and bad) shaped by what we then do practically with it in the long term. You're right - positive thinking is just a mask.

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    1. Carl, I thank you, I could not have said what you did so well. But I agree with you wholehearedly. Sometimes we have to sit there with a bad emotion, and just trust there is another side.

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    2. Thanks Carl. I am glad you understand what I am talking about. The "fake it" thing isn't working. I am sick of abusers screaming at me, "Change your life" when I have sat here trying to come up with solutions for years. They all act like I can control everything and that somehow I am NOT doing actions, that will fix everything.

      For years and years, I did the "be happy" "dream of a better day" "pretend everything is okay" when it's not. I even glommed on to their sales cons via religion or self improvement, hoping for anything better. I just got a bag of hot poop.

      I am glad you let yourself feel what you feel. That is what I am doing. I'm not interested in wearing the mask anymore. It didn't work anyhow. I don't want anyone around me telling me what to feel or who to be or giving me their long lists of "solutions", I don't have the money or physical ability to pull off. I believe you have some wisdom there, in feeling what you feel at that time and coming out of the other side. Many ACONs are taught to repress emotions. How many decades did I tell people, "Oh everything's okay. Even the modus operanti of the superfat, is always have to say "Yeah I'm okay", look at the size acceptance movement denying reality, this is done to keep the abusers from pounding them day and night acting like body weight is something that can be changed automatically. With the ACON stuff, narcs don't allow you to feel your emotions. Stop crying, shut up---"Everyone's got problems" which is the same as saying "Your problems don't matter to ME." At this point I got nothing left to lose feeling real emotions and writing about them. They can have their fake. I was a crappy actress anyhow.

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  6. And just to tell you, there was a woman at work, who just buried her 15 year old cat. On the day of the burial, people are trying to cheer her up. No kidding. Sometimes you just want and need to feel pain without any extra burdens, or time limits, or any thing else imposed on you.

    I feel the best thing to do to help, if you want to, is to just sit there and shut up. The presence of another person there is comfort enough.

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    1. Some of them probably meant well trying to cheer her up but the best bet was to just let her have space and feel the sadness over the loss of her pet. The time limits and rest make people feel more nervous.

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  7. Hi Peep,
    Great post! I am a lover of truth and I always know I can count on that with you here. I don't think I ever really desired more than that from anyone.
    About the positive thinking and the narcissists, I was struck by what the narc sister-in-law had to report about my brother's passing. She said he told of how he "was looking forward to seeing his mother and grandmother again." And I thought, "oh my God, he wasn't even permitted to be sad about his liver failing and the fact that he was dying. It had to be a party, something to "look forward to."
    And what a load anyway, our malignant narcissistic mother was the bain of his existence, and she had only passed away two months beforehand. How much could he miss her? And as for our saintly grandmother, who is responsible for all my positive memories of childhood, he referred to her on his visit to me as "a very controlling woman.". I should have pushed him on it and asked if he meant her paying his child support for him, or her bailing him out of every bad situation ... but he just couldn't (or didn't want) to see that that was my mother talking! She had her hand up the back of his shirt! I assume it is for this very fact that he found himself a narc wife and was okay with the manipulation.
    Anyway, my responds to his wife's telling me of how in the last year he and my mother had " gotten close" (ie; she was hoovering him to get between the two of us and succeeded) and how he said he was "looking forward to seeing she and my grandmother again was, " He will not be finding my mother and my grandmother in the same place!"
    Michelle

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    1. Thanks Michelle. I never demanded anyone think positive around me too. If friends get depressed or have things to share that are "negative", I'm not positive blocking them though it seems to be popular with some out there.

      That's sad your narc SIL had to make about your brother's passing turning "death" even into a "positive" sad. I once got upset at a Christian friend who wrote about family friend's singing and praising God even next to their relatives death bed? I said "Weren't any of them sad?" It's hard to explain the conversation but it kind of bugged me. Nothing against praising God but they seemed all a bit too happy about this. [this was a younger person's death] I can see some of these positivity princesses, hovering around someone's death bed even to tell them to be smiling for heaven even as they writhe in pain or giving lectures about "going to the light" etc, anything to make light of the suffering. This kind of refers back to even cancer victims I've known put under way too much pressure to "appear brave" while they are barfing in the back room.

      I think of the things I've gotten with my health problems even being told by one person 12 years ago, "You upset people because you look like you are dying and no one wants to be around that"

      Yeah how could he miss a narc mother? inside he probably was afraid of seeing her since it would mean he went to the "wrong place". For some of us our idea of hell would be eternity with relatives. I could handle some of the nice aunts and cousins and would want them to in heaven with me, but some of the others, it would be like a When Dreams Come Nightmare, I'd be running out of the room or away from the cloud...to see some of them. Sadly many men raised by narcs will choose narc wives.

      Love your response to them. Sorry for the loss of your brother, I wish things had gone better for him too.

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  8. Thanks for the video. The words that come to mind are "cheerful cruelty" - to critize and invalidate another person's experiences (especially in a support group), in order to prove themselves "better" with their smiley face denial! I also detest the pink ribbon industry: somebody's getting rich from it and it's an inappropriate metaphor for addressing the horror of cancer. I think the "positive attitude" thing is a post feminist exhortation to "be ladylike", disguised as strength. Don't complain, be the "cool girl" & don't make someone else uncomfortable. Be fabulous, be Wonderwoman, follow a trend like a shaved head statement, amputate your own breasts (thanks,Angelina Jolie), etc instead of connecting the dots, naming and confronting the corporate bastards
    that have been eroding your health from cradle to grave. To be negative means to question and THINK critically with the brains that God gave you!






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    1. Sure. It is "cheerful cruelty" just mean stuff, smile or else. Support groups have gotten all about "recovery" and "damn" you if you don't recover and put a positive spin on everything from your terminal cancer to your decades of depression. I know someone who got thrown out of a breast cancer support group for being too "negative" and crying about having cancer so I find the pink ribbon crap, annoying too. Even there they don't talk about what causes all the cancer. Yes they are getting rich. Sure "be lady like"--women are always smiling and nuturing even as they are dying. I left all the Lipedema health boards, sure I still read, but since I have the condition so severely, I tired fast of being told perfect diets would fix everything. I spent all this money to buy food to get my blood sugars back down to 110s [illness had jacked me up to 120s, 130s and some 140s], isn't it ironic, I lay out the cash for chopped salad, a bunch of meat and veg and they come down. I swear the more I can spend the better they are, and there's this trend I have noticed that if I don't eat enough they go higher.

      Sure we are all supposed to be "cool" and have no emotions. Around here the culture of the place is very locked down emotions. I can barely stand it. Some of the people even at grocery stores look like zombies. I say things to my husband like can't the couples even talk or laugh with one another? Maybe I am weird. We are all supposed to be "strong" "Wonderwomen" who never sweat--yeah now you know why I came out against feminism, shave our heads, and yeah amputate our own breasts. With cancer, no one is discussing the GMOs, pesticides and endless environmental poisons. I agree being negative means using one's brain. Our world has become more negative, and too many are interested in keeping the serfs smiling and clueless as they get screwed over.

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  9. Bravo, Peep! Speak the truth, Sister:).It is really not safe these days to show one's emotions to a world choked full of narcs. I was thinking I'm greatly surrounded by them due to the evil roots of the land where I temporaily reside. It is one of the original narc evil vortexs. I will be returning to your neck of the woods early next year, and I think this evil is everywhere now. Being a foreigner in a strange land, I have been in battle with the gluttony & greed of narcs in several situations not returning money that is rightly due. As 1 Tim.6:10 said," The love of money is the root of all evil". I agree with you that many churches are now narc watering holes where they are seeking new prey. There is the church and then there is the body of Christ. Those hungering & thristing after righteous...Narc zombies love the lie & are following the father of lies. One cannot serve two masters.

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    1. I agree we are now in a world where emotions are bad, and not to be shown and it's getting worse. I may write about that. I guess America wants to be the smiling stoics as the place collapses around them. I would tell someone with the ability to escape America, maybe rethink coming back. I wish I could leave. LOL Yeah that doesn't sound patriotic. "Love it or Leave it ya ingrate!" If Trump cancels social security I may decide to head for the Canadian border. Sorry you have dealt with narcs though in the foreign land too. Hmm maybe it's going crazy all over, bible says people will wax cold worldwide. With money, they will claw your eyes out and go to town. I see the cheapness even towards husbands from "employers", it's the holidays, here's a 50 percent cut in pay for your freelance. I'm sure I'll see one of them driving by in a new car too. Yeah the churches are narc watering holes, you never see anyone but the perfect patrol, with sneering smiles and tsks tsks about Sally and Joey who couldn't get their "lives together" and let's pray [prey in their case] I think the real body of Christ is fleeing those places.

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    2. Hi Peep, I actually left the US for a simpler life with greener pastures. I wanted easy access to non-gmo foods, a purer lifestyle amongst other things. Well, guess what? I'm coming back after 2 years, it is not easier in a foreign country( at least not for me). It seems to be turbulent everywhere. Yes, it is true...the real body of Christ can no longer listen to the sugar-coated twisted gospel. Real life issues and the "times" we live in are not being address in most churches. Sorry, your husband's employer could not display generosity during the holiday season. What ever happen to Christmas bonuses and a "thank you" for working with us?

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  10. Hi peeps,
    Thanks for writing back. I think I may have gotten off on a tangent there, it was something that really bothered me. My point was really how bad it is when you are actively dying and so ingrained into your psyche is the idea that your number one priority is to cater to the "fragile state" of the narcissists in the room so they won't "feel" any "discomfort" about it all. Talk about slavery!
    I just reread what you wrote here and it is just so eloquently put! (makes sense to me). You really hit the nail on the head of exactly what it feels like to be a scapegoat and an ACON. This is a post I would like to refer to from time to time in the future. I think if I wrote it I might be inclined to put it on the refrigerator for daily reference whenever a a "fawn moment" comes a lurking. Truly great stuff! Thanks for sharing!
    I also find it interesting that while the narcissists seem to play by the same handbook, that our description of those blows exacted by them seem to be word for word. Such as getting "kicked in the teeth," for being nice. I felt and used that same one and many others here and other places I have visited. It seems that their "invisible" and plausibly deniable blows have universal points of "impact" felt by the receiver. Can you imagine the concentration it would take to deliver such?
    For some time I wanted to tell you (you brought it up again recently) that I remember seeing the woman you describe as your mother in the Today show window ...

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    1. I could weigh almost 700lbs, be wheezing in the back room, almost dead back then with ulcers all over my body, and still be visiting my mother [husband did driving putting my huge fat body in the car--we usually had vans or giant cars] and still I'd have to worry about the "fragile emotions" of narcissists and keeping them pleased.I was thinking about that the other day, how sick I was and she remained the ultimate center of attention. So sure I can see some scapegoats in the hospital even dying being told to CATER to narcissists. I was in states of health around my family where normal family would have been driving me to the hospital or not expecting me to make car trips and coming to see me. Well my mother would come home from hospitals visiting people and talk about how "lazy" they were or the requests they made like asking for a straw.

      I am glad my post helped you. I need to reread it too to keep my mind clear around the crazy-making narcissists and to remind myself to AVOID them. With narcissists there is always a given NONE OF OUR FEELINGS MATTER AND ONLY THEIRS DO. They want you smiling so everything "looks good". I have noted that in my family, the training never to show emotions was huge, and notice the cold stoics got the "most respect".

      Sure they kick us in the teeth for being nice, agree with that. They know how to appear "nice" themselves as they deliver the blows but when people show no emotions but flat affect and false smiles, many are easily fooled. Hmm with the woman in Today show, let me ask you some questions below.

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  11. Continued ...
    standing in the driving rain, with her sign about her impending shopping spree, jumping up and down. She stands out in my mind because I couldn't believe (at that time) that she didn't get the crassness of her behavior, that to publicly be sharing such glee over the death of your husband just because you "came into some money over it and were ready to shp till you dropped" might not be so well received by many in America. At least not back then. I'm sure I wondered how she'd gotten to the age she was and missed that fact. I know I !UST have thought of my own mother's behavior, which I could not yet understand, and would also cause me an inclination to blush!
    Just for fun, if I were asked to describe the woman I saw that day she would be about 5'8 or 9, light skinned, dark hair, wearing no makeup to speak of, a largish nose at the tip, nice looking enough, and wearing transparent rain gear including a "sombrero?" type hat. I couldn't tell you what the sign said exactly, but I,m pretty sure it mentioned the proceeds of her husband's life insurance policy and her shopping intention because this was what gave me the info. Anyway, how close was I after 20 years, LOL?
    I am sorry that you face the challenges that you, especially the health ones, which must be the toughest. I think your attitude is quite positive under the circumstances. You prepare interesting and health meals for you and your husband, you do photography and get outdoors to appreciate nature, you integrate as best you can with community or art projects and you maintain a blog, a very interesting blog, which is no small feat.I say, keep up the good work! And keep in tune with your true spirits as you are doing, good or bad. And know that many appreciate and can relate to all you share.
    Thanks again. sincerely, Michelle

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    1. I can't remember her holding a sign but it's been so many years, she could have been and it's a detail I forgot or I couldn't read it on my crummy little TV with bad reception.
      My father died in September of 98 and I believe she was in NYC sometime in October/November of 98. [for Christmas shopping presumbly] when she lived over 1,000 miles away.

      You actually got the height right and she has dark hair. Her nose is rather bulbous too. Was she a homely creature? [I'm fat but have a far more pleasant face, hope this doesn't sound like bragging but I always wondered about her being angry and messed up over her lack of facial beauty]

      Not sure about the sombero, possible if it was raining. This person could have been a like-soul....maybe more then a few narcissists out there. I don't watch mainstream news is Today News still doing their thing?

      Thanks regarding my challenges and saying I have a positive attitude. Hey we were drawing cartoons together last night and I enjoyed my chopped salad and baked pork chop for dinner, and went outside along the beach when it got warm enough. A friend is visiting us for the holidays, and I have to clean this place up today but planning some fun moments glad it warmed up for the weekend so I am not housebound for the first time in 3 and half weeks. So yeah I do try. Thanks regarding blog. Have Happy Holidays Michelle. :)

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    2. My husband remembers her wearing a rain coat in the Today Show window! I asked him about this though he doesn't remember her sign specifically.....:-0

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  12. Hi Peeps,
    She looked a lot like the witch on the wizzard of oz, minus the hook nose!

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