Thursday, October 30, 2014
Dr. Phil Needs to Call Out Narcissists and Sociopaths Directly
Yesterday I watched this show on Dr. Phil, the second video has it, in it's entirety. The show includes a past guest, Andrue who seems to be a very strong young man now in recovery who got taken out of his house for shooting himself in the chest. I saw the first show some time ago and he relayed how he wanted to escape the abuse and misery he was in. He was taken out of the home and reunited with his real father who treats him far better. This is a second show where his parents Minnie and Lon [his stepfather] were allowed to come back and make a plea for their children to be returned to their home.
His siblings were taken out of the abusive home as Andrue relayed to CPS, what abuses were happening from his baby sister being left in a car seat locked behind a closet door, the substance abuse, and beatings. To be frank, these parents were obvious malignant narcissists, both could even be sociopaths especially the stepfather, whose cold eyes glared at Dr. Phil and asserted his authority time and time again. He was evil and cruel. He didn't even pretend to be nice for national TV but one could fathom behind closed doors, he is far worse.
The mother was an obvious malignant narcissist, they could have put her photo in the dictionary above the disorder. In her case, there were definitely some histrionic leanings too but her cold eyes, lack of love and endless excuses and inability to face her sins, all showed the real deal. Now in Dr. Phil's defense, he called her out on lies about her substance abuse, displayed her drunk arrogant and self promoting Twitters, and one video where she showed her dead eyes in even fuller force where every picture of her was of modeling poses for too many minutes. He also challenged the other one and put up evidence that what Andrue had described was true, as the mother, Minnie, was divorcing Lon, the stepfather and father of the younger children put claims of violence and abuse in her divorce papers.
One sickening and self revelatory moment is when Lon claimed he had burned all of Andrue's photos. Minnie's fake tears are disgusting. The show proceeded in a very bad direction. Andrue comes out on stage and his mother Minnie kept up with her excuses and sickening denials of her evil..."I did the best I could!" Dr, Phil and a CPS leader said, they needed to comply with what CPS wanted to get their children back. Andrue said, they should never be moved and were happier where they were at. At one point he seems to be the only one with any sanity stating, "Quit playing the victim!" to his mother.
Dr. Phil and the CPS worker talked about reunification with these rotten parents, and I was livid. What these parents have wrong will never be fixable. They have no hearts and soul and no consciences or love. I kept thinking, "Oh great, now these narcs will get a can of get smart, and do an acting job to fool all the social workers!" It seemed like Dr. Phil was giving them advice to play the system. Andrue looked devastated near the end, he is free due to his age but you could see the fear he had for his siblings in his face as they blathered on about reunification. I found myself thinking, doesn't Dr. Phil know these parents are malignant narcissists? I am not a Dr. Phil supporter and wonder about some of the influences of this show, but their personality disorders were so OBVIOUS!
Maybe legally there are reasons he can't come out and say, "You are malignant narcissists!" Maybe he put on this show to display their bad behaviors to the world in defense of Andrue, I don't know. Something seemed weird. Andrue's heart seemed to be breaking as he said, why do they get all the second chances or something along those lines. He isn't perfect either, I can tell he was impacted by all the abuse, but there is too much outside evidence that he was telling the truth about his abusive parents. I hope that his siblings are protected.
Dr. Phil was wrong to even couch reunification with narcissistic parents as a possibility. He betrayed Andrue with this talk. He let the mother insult and berate Andrue with nary a word especially when she said to him, "I've apologized to you over and over!" I hope and pray Andrue goes "No contact" with both. In his case, he is fortunate to have a loving bio father. There needs to be some standing up and direct exposure. There needs to be more truth out there about how these kind of people operate. A malignant narcissist and sociopath can never be a decent parent. Leave the children in foster homes where they are thriving. Child protective services should be having seminars on sociopathy and narcissistic personality disorder to educate their workers. Children need protected from them.
Why focus on the parents getting the children back? This sickened me. Sadly Minnie announced she was pregnant by Lon.Maybe she was lying but I thought, "Poor baby!". I hope Andrue can go have a good life and was glad he was brave enough to stand up after he was taken out of the home on behalf of his siblings. Many agreed with me on the Dr. Phil message boards. To even discuss possible reunification was a betrayal of these children.