When I was growing up, I was slapped and told I was too sensitive and needed to harden up. Feelings were to be erased and one was to become a stoic of no emotion and talk about nothing. This was something I was not good at. There was no room for any sensitive artists.
One thing I have noticed in my family, is the children, and some of them "TURN" when they reach their late teens. I saw it happen with my own sister. I recently saw a picture of my sister's oldest son on a social website, and it scared me. He was trying to look tough while wearing cammo in the woods. I don't know if the giant gun he was holding, was a real one, or an air gun but it was big.
He looks out at the camera and I notice that cold look in the eyes, I have seen in so many in my family. His eyes oddly remind me of my brothers. This is a kid who was very nice, I remember laughing and smiling with him. The last time I saw him was around 2011, so the change was pretty immediate. Maybe I am being too sensitive, and I know teens show off by looking "tough" but his eyes don't look that way. What happened to him? He used to be such a sweet kid. I feel like crying. He is someone else I became a stranger with.
Sometimes I have thought about how I was hated for being sensitive and having feelings. I would cry upon missing people or express worry or be frozen out. It's strange these are feelings that my husband loves, he says things like "Peep cares." They told me for so long I was the "bad" one. I'm tired of seeing people with these kind of eyes. It's like the light goes out in them. It scares me.