I feel like that second one. But its getting easier. I think that if I focus on the knives as well as the flower it helps. It does take time.
I did have this panicky feeling that came out of nowhere again. I know that these feelings are coming from actual thoughts or words that came from someone who does not wish me well. Even after all these years.
What is scary is when the flowers seem to turn into knives and you ask "What did I do?". I allow people some faux paus but when you feel like a worm again, it's bad news.
Sorry you felt panicky, yes sometimes it can be a memory triggering you back to an abuser even after years and years.
If I didn't have kids depending on me I would say it can't happen soon enough.
ReplyDeleteUnderstand. I can't imagine having kids in this world. I'd probably cry for them everyday.
DeleteI feel like that second one. But its getting easier. I think that if I focus on the knives as well as the flower it helps. It does take time.
ReplyDeleteI did have this panicky feeling that came out of nowhere again. I know that these feelings are coming from actual thoughts or words that came from someone who does not wish me well. Even after all these years.
What is scary is when the flowers seem to turn into knives and you ask "What did I do?". I allow people some faux paus but when you feel like a worm again, it's bad news.
DeleteSorry you felt panicky, yes sometimes it can be a memory triggering you back to an abuser even after years and years.