Saturday, October 31, 2015

Aspergers on Arthur





Having Aspergers is like living on another planet. The scene where Arthur comes talking in gibberish to the Aspie who crash-landed on the new planet is the story of my life. I can communicate far better then writing each way. There are times neurotypicals confuse me with their small talk especially in groups. I noticed they had the Aspie-astronaut painting and getting some understanding via their interest, interests--those can be a saving grace to Aspies in this world. Art was mine for many years, now I have several. In the other video, that teacher is pretty understanding, most Aspies aren't that blessed. I remember crying in kindergarten being afraid of some huge building blocks and the teacher would put me in the corner. Keep the mimes and "dummies" away from me at that age too. I always like the cartoon Arthur, and have embarrassingly watched it as an adult. I don't have kids to explain why I am sitting there watching. LOL.

15 comments:

  1. Do you think that things like sensory integration actually helps? We got that for my step-daughter but by that time she was an older teen and I think it was too late. She has a boy that is displaying some repetitive behaviors, I think I am thinking that being autistic and having aspergers is about the same thing. Is that assumption correct?

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    1. I have an autistic grandbaby, she is 7. She can't communicate regular, but aspie can. They are on the same spectrum, but ours is severe classic autism.

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    2. I think it does. I had it at the age of 43 with an OT. It did help me to calm and focus. I know that is VERY late and I would joke about that. She found I had some serious sensory issues. The earlier the better. I hope your step-daughter was open to the activities and followed them. In my case the legs were being worked on and physical issues as well. She talked about my focus issues and sensory ones. They were figuring me out quite a bit before my Lipedema diagnosis.

      Being autistic and Aspergers is same thing but think of this is way, its on a spectrum and now they don't even diagnose you with Aspergers but put autism spectrum disorder on the paper. Autism is on the more severe end as Joan mentions they are non-verbal and have the more classic signs of autism while Aspergers is on the less severe end, and you are verbal and can appear to "function", but have definite challenges. Even among Aspies some are more severe then others. I could do what they call "cloak" to an extent which means I learned some "social rules" to actually hold jobs and survive but people could tell I was different and there was still the social cue and other major problems and the weight added another burden to the mix. Some Aspies are more severe and even end up in group homes while you see some who can "function". I sometimes think I was forced to do things beyond my capabilities, as a result of my abuse, I was basically just tossed into the world and told to sink or swim. That wore me out healthwise all the time with the extended demands. I find the regular responsibilities of adulthood HARD[well money would make them easier] but obviously have been out on my own for many years.

      I have a nephew who is HFA, high functioning autism, who talks a little bit but not very much, and he is mid-range on the spectrum. I had some more severe signs of autism when young if you remember the article where I wrote "my baby plays with light motes". I was verbal but did not walk until I was almost 2 years old something neglected by the N parents. I believe my NM turned on me or chose me for the scapegoat because of my Aspergers. I hope things work out with your grandbaby Joan S. I know severe classic autism is very difficult.

      My sensory training involved doing certain exercises. I do often consider what life would have been if my Aspergers was addressed earlier.

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    3. Thanks Peeps, she is doing well, it takes acceptance, and understanding. If she hits me, I have to say "ouch" and not just tell her to stop it, she doesn't like to be ordered around but she communicates and is sorry when I use emotions. This is amazing at connecting with her. The Autistic Society is really great and has tons of support, which my daughter rarely takes, she is so stubborn and well, I can ramble about that forever.

      Its terrible Peeps to read how you never got the support you needed, because your parents decided to be abusive to you instead. I have had a hard time getting through life, and I realize that as an Aspie, the sink or swim thing must have been much harder.

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  2. A lot of Aspies have what are considered unusual fears. I was afraid of hair. My family thought that this was bizarre. My fear began when I was quite young. I later developed an intense fear of the dark that continued into adulthood. People simply don't understand these fears or the intensity of them.

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    1. Yes people do not understand. I am actually STILL afraid of the dark, pitch black and I'm screaming. I leave the lights on at night. I have met another Aspie who was afraid of hair too. I think that is a sensory issue. I was scared of the dark while very young and some abusers would make me sleep without a nightlight even with stairs to navigate in pitch blackness. My parents let me have one, because even they probably didn't want to hear me cry all night and I learned to get tons of flashlights. I do remember people being angry at me all the time for being afraid of things. Anxiety can be far higher for Aspies and this is something I have, and I have been told "buck up" and "What is wrong with you?" my entire life. I am afraid of elevators to the max. I almost puke everytime I get on one, and did not ride one for 10 years--I even took 6 flights of stairs at one place. I became forced to use them with the health but there are times I have refused and shocked people. I feel okay using them in hospitals or medical centers though anxious because I think they could get me out. I can't stand to be in a small room without windows with the door closed either. Yes these are fears people never understood. I'm afraid now even knowing I have to see an oral surgeon tomorrow--at least one close to home and where my charity is helping me, I get the feelings NTs don't have nearly the same amount of fears and anxiety I do. Of course surrounded by Ns who had no fear and a sociopathic one who never felt it, that was even scarier.

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    2. I think that a lot of my fears came from my family's hatred of me (both stated and unstated). I half expected them to drop me off in the woods to die. I think that they would have perhaps done exactly this if they wouldn't have been arrested.

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    3. I wonder why mine didn't relinquish custody of me. I wish they had. I begged to live with this other aunt at the age of 5-6. I would have missed my siblings at the time but it would have been worth it. I think many of the narcs wish I was dead. Yes I knew I was unwanted and hated too, you had the exact feeling.

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  3. I have suddenly developed an intense dislike for your kindergarten teacher. You were just a Little One. I can remember kids crying as late as second and third grade when they got on the bus-"separation" from the parent(s). I'm so sorry, Peep. Hey, what's to be embarrassed about? You're a groan-up with all the associated rights to unemployment, medical problems, plumbing problems etc. You can watch what ever you want. Kick that kindergarten teacher out of your head along with the FOO. Tell 'em you're not renewing your subscription to their issues. Don't we wish it was that simple, huh?
    Meanwhile, thank you for including me on your planet and showing me the world through your glasses. Your place is waaayyyy more creative than mine. I could only wish to have the talent you have-in any medium.
    TW

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    1. I don't think much of her either. That was a very brief time in the public school system and then I got put in the Catholic schools by first grade. Yes I can watch what I want, may as well have a little joy since we are paying the cable bill to see Arthur :P Yeah we wish it was that easy. LOL love the term "groan-up" that about explains it doesn't it. Seems like life becomes nothing but responsibilities many I can't afford to clear up. Tuesday I have to go buy a used tire for our car and go price an exhaust system. I needed a class for Aspies "Adulting While Poor" [LOL like that article I wrote] Thanks for visiting my planet, and thanks for pointing out its a creative place. :p Always glad I met you too TW. Always love reading your perspective on things. I imagine you are someone where if we met in real life, you would enjoy my creative world and we could share it between each other. We do have fun in our creativity, I was goofing around taking videos in the rain yesterday on an old digital camera.

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  4. I watched a PBS special that said engineers kids have a higher rate of autism than the population at large. Her father is an electrical engineer and has a high IQ, but in social situations he is very difficult to get along with. Socially he acts like he has a personality disorder. He has no empathy and gets insulted at just about every word out of your mouth.

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    1. I've worked with and been educated by a great deal of scientists, PhD's and I tell you they are the toughest people. You have to be practically lying on the floor crying, dying before they pay you any mind. And the words that come out of their mouth, gee, it sounds insensitive, and they seem to come about this very authentically.

      Science seems to make people less emphatic, they make everything too darn logical. I had math teachers in high school and they are great, wonderful. Wait till you are taught at university level mathematician, they don't have patience.

      I kind of got the feeling that they just live in a world of logic and don't know much else. I don't know if it's a PD, I mean they don't have Nrages, or go in for the supply or stuff like that. They just seem cold. But I always wondered about that. Glad you brought that up Q.

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    2. Ever seen the show Doc Martin, there are those male science Aspies, though not every Aspie is the logical good at math sort. I wish they admitted emotional Aspies who stink at math existed. I think those Aspies must develop different able to get jobs and move up due to their skills which are so good, they don't need the social stuff. I have met those types too. Most Aspies have empathy but then there is that subset of the scientists, I don't understand them. Everything is about logic, Because Aspergers is neurological it is possible to have a PD too. Yes I know that complicates things.

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    3. I'll have to check out that show sometime, I've never seen it. I know the science people can be so one dimensional, I'm not sure if its just so they don't appear sensitive. I know in science you have to have a whole lot of ego in order to get anywhere. They have to trust you, and me second guessing myself all the time, it didn't work. Plus mother calling me stupid all the time, try to go to work in science when you are narc supply. I mean I looked crazy. And they don't like that, they want to trust you.

      Its kind of a scary world of pure logic. If someone found me as a target it usually was another dept., the non science part of the company narcs that came after me.

      Why oh why didn't I know this stuff about narcissism decades ago? I could have managed, I really believe that now, I could have managed, I just needed the little piece of awareness.

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    4. Sounds like the narcs/sociopaths rule there too. It's sad one needs an ego to get ahead, it will affect the science. The biases are blinding too many now, where some seem to be narcs who don't want to admit they are wrong or have research affected by megacorporations. Yes it is a frightening world of pure logic. I've seen doctors like that and they are scary. I wish I knew about the narcissism too in my 20s, would have made things go a lot lot easier.

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