Thursday, February 19, 2015

"You Just Have to Ignore The Little Things"


Do you realize mothers like this ruin their children's relationships.
You were scared to get close to me
because you knew it'd make her angry
she was to always come first
for visits and everything else.
she even told **** this year not to visit me.
[last year]
stuff like that happened all the time.
It is not normal ****, do you at least admit that?
I tried asking you what the real deal was? Like why treat me that way? You would want to know wouldn't you
She rejected me for weight for my whole life
People can let go of old stuff but not when there is plenty of new. Also you did not have my life. I was left to almost die in the ghetto, and when they did stuff like ignore me when I was sick, it reminded me of that
You were cared and protected and she treats you with respect. I am too old to take the disrespect.


I don't care what she would find out. You just have to ignore little things. His travel finances werenot good at the time is my guess I don't know to defend this. I don't travel.
"You just have to ignore the little things"
I was thinking about this today, how we try and try to fix relationships that are beyond repair. I was pondering the other day, why I scrapped and bowed for their crumbs and how sad it all was. I struggle with the feelings that I did not stand up for myself enough. I suppose all ACONs do when it's all said and done, even if we manage to get out of the fog and go NC.

I know one thing that rescues all of us is finding those who do love and respect us in our lives. Their kindness stands out in stark opposition to the above. These people are Live Savers in the Narcissistic ocean. One ponders some of the crazy statements putting the pieces of the puzzle together. We want people who value us in our lives not chasing after those who never did.


  1. One thing I know now is that we must cultivate self love and internal resources. Even this was stolen from us, and now it is a work in progress for me. I work hard at not trying to get acceptance from others. I believe once I do that, I will spot the ones who don't value me quite easily.

    I struggle with the feelings that I did not stand up for myself enough either. It all seems so easy now. Well, more easy.

    I will no longer ignore the little things. When someone says or does something to hurt me, I'll realize that person needs to leave my life. It is not worth it.

    1. I agree it is a work in progress and we need to not ignore the "little things" or the giant red flags. I know I have to let go of the seeking acceptance from others too. I will be happier and will spot the toxic ones too far sooner.

    2. I do struggle a bit asking myself why God decided to give four children to this complete icecube incapable of love. Even her focus on them like trophies used to absolutely nauseate me.

  2. For me, I believe she had a uterus and was capable of producing an egg. As children of narcissists, Christianity is a bigger challenge, but God has said, "From infancy you have known the scriptures." 2 Tim. 3:15.

    Also, I heard in church some months ago about an innocent man who spent 25 years in prison. When asked how he felt about it he said, "God loves me, God is sovereign, what else matters?

    I know, a little too simplistic for us as ACON's but I need something.

    1. There is always someone worse off then us, I really feel for those people who spent 25 years in prison and were innocent. I am glad that one was exonerated. I know we have asked "Why". I read the book of Job for understanding about all these things. Psalm 73 points out the wicked will have children. I know I will have a family in heaven even if not here. I rejected God for many years because of my family and became a Christian in my 30s. I believe God will right all these wrongs, even if justice never occurs in this world, He will be dealing with the wicked. I don't think that is simplistic, really it is the only answer to deal with this insane world.