Wednesday, November 26, 2014

No more Crushing Us!

We are being sued by someone who hit our parked car almost two years ago. Yesterday we got served. You know when you feel like throwing up whenever there is an uninvited knock at the door, this is not good. We had and have car insurance so hopefully will be okay, but why did this guy wait? And what kind of person waits til two days before Thanksgiving to serve you papers, almost two years after the fact? I don't blame the server, she was nice.

So add another one to the list wanting money we don't have and add that to the mega tax debt. The whirlpool into the financial abyss seems never ending. Well one advantage of homelessness is no servers at your door.

 I hate money more and more, to me it's become a joke, like the magic green stuff that vanishes into thin air. They seem to want me to be like a magician snapping my fingers for it to show up, how am I supposed to do all of this? The demands are insane. I am surprised we have made it this long. At least I can get medical care but this is one reason America is going down the tubes. Many people are getting crushed. I know the hands out for the cash of the better off then me never end however I still see the people too who have lives and vacations I never could dream of. If I had money though I would not be blowing it on cruises and being stuck in a floating prison tin-can with 4,000 souls--my idea of a nightmare.

 What would life be free of money-burdens. Definitely a lot happier. Time to become a freegan? Move in with someone? I can't stand to be without my own household. Absolutely cannot stand it, even if it would mean less pressure on us both. I am free of my family but no one is lining up for the job and I hate having roommates and would never burden friends this way so our only option is to keep paying these impossible bills. The pot is empty Mr. Lawsuit! Can I join the Hutterites or something? Would they take a near elderly couple with messed up bodies?

 Religious morality supercedes my idea once voiced under duress, that we each go get a sugar-parent, no sugar daddy for me! One can't divorce someone they love even if they are dead broke on either side. Divorce only makes you poorer! Two Aspies [he doesn't admit he is an Aspie] suck at "life skills". Many of the normals have broken the code of actually making a decent living but my body can only do so much. The hours to stay alive are many, it takes me longer to do things people take for granted. Time for me is a rushing river. I'm not someone who "gets bored".

My husband is constantly writing only to lose work via contract employers, that always happens during the holidays. I think he is stumped on how to improve things too. Problem is life coaches cost money. Maybe they should have a special brand of them for the poor to help us get our lives in order. The psychological counselors, will pass out the pills but really can't help you if your main problem is lack of the green stuff. I'm trying to get him to go to career counselors for a new action plan or something. I need to make pin money on etsy or something, but need to figure out how to get more craft supplies. My comic could be sold on there perhaps but is still in progress. Too bad nothing is selling on ebay, it's gotten bad.

 For the poor the holidays are not a shopping spree full of rich food and parties, and presents but when one's income usually drops. I have never gone shopping on a black Friday with the stampeding idiots. Most poor people secretly hate the holidays, they may try to do what they can for their kids but most of us just want the annual greed fests to be OVER. Thanksgiving I am cool with but the rest of it forget it.

We are down to just so much for the last week of November. I bought the turkey three weeks ago, to make sure we would have one, as well as the boxes of stuffing, a can of green beans, and rutabagas but planning a Thanksgiving feast in a week of major food insecurity feels weird. We even ate a charity cabbage I got from the monthly church soup kitchen mixed in two meals of rice noodles and I made 4 meals out of a package of chicken thighs this week. I am so tired of cooking it's not funny but frugality this month has demanded endless from scratch cooking such as the soups made with parsnips. I can cook anything now. I could be a chef if I was in good shape. I wonder if I can make an apple tart with olive oil? Can one make hummus out of dried garbanzo beans and peanut butter? I suppose the internet can tell me.

 My friends help me out all the time, I am very thankful to them. They keep me going. They don't realize how much. Man we are so tired.

We need a break! We are far overdue. I told one friend I am so tired, if everything collapses, maybe I would be relieved. Maybe some take to the streets to escape the bill marathon. I wonder. I want to feel hope again. So many years of struggle JUST TO STAY ALIVE.

I was so upset yesterday, after he got the papers. My husband told me "Calm down, or you are going to stroke out". The last thing we needed was this guy suing us. His own too fast driving caused the accident to begin with. I wasn't there, I was home when it happened. Did he want some cash for shopping or something? He's gone to an empty well!

 See: Materialism, Crushed by Bills and Baby Boomers


  1. I like how you put that, "Poor people just want the greed fests to be over." And I think this entire post could be made into a billboard or something, its very powerful, lots of amazing points.

    I'm hoping and everything works out regarding the lawsuit. Such lousy timing. I remember the days of returning my kids disney movies to buy food. Mother thought that was so funny she had to tell everyone.

    I really hope it works out about the lawsuit. It's just one step at a time.

  2. Thanks Joan S. Yes we want the state mandated greed fest and Saturnalia over with! I am hoping everything works out too. We are tired of being crushed. I suppose the narcs didn't teach me enough resilency for real life, they always got their ways and were the ones busy doing the crushing instead of the other way around. Their message only bad things happen to bad people feels like one I will forever be slogging through. I suppose I missed my own ship coming in by not suing a restaurant I fell down in but that's just not me. That is terrible your mother mocked you for being poor and having to sell movies. Don't feel bad, just about every stick has been sold in our apartment. I may put the comics up if I can bear to part with my Harvey Pekar's.

    I am sure I would be in for it, if they knew I picked up cabbage and cranberries from a food pantry and ate at a free community dinner this month. I'd never hear the end of it, Oh the shame!! She is probably gobbling down a 30 dollar crab leg dinner now at Red Lobster as we speak. Thanks regarding the lawsuit. I know how to fight in court, so it stinks I wasn't there. I can't be a witness since I wasn't there. Not sure how husband will feel about my directions.

  3. To clarify: we're going to talk next week with our insurance agent, who said that the company would defend the claim. We won't know how the process is supposed to work until we talk with her.

    So that may or may not ease some of our worries. Suffice to say that such experiences are making me more radicalized by the day -- I've become convinced that slapping yet another patch on the tire is no longer an option. That's how every day life got so terrible for so many people.

    My goal remains the same: find a way to bring things back into balance, and force the bad guys off. Somehow, I don't think my choice of phrasing will start with: "Pretty please...pretty please with sugar on top." You get the gist.

  4. THEY hit your PARKED car and they're suing? Wow, I hope that goes well for them, not.

    I hear you on hating the greed fest... In my poor years I remember feeling devastated at how little I was able to do for anyone else at the holidays. All I could do was hunker down.

    If you're writing a comic and want a little money from it, it's more likely to happen if you post it online; link it here and on any social/talk sites you use, and sell an ad banner. I've known a few people in the webcomics world, and while very few people make enough money to live on that way, the couple of dollars you get every so often for hosting an ad-supported comic could make a big difference for you. More popular webcomics can sell merchandise or books.

    You could also try joining or a similar content outsourcing site - they pay you to write blog posts for companies.

    1. Yeah, My husband did not swing the door open or anything but cop decided to blame him, so they all come after us.

      I hate the holidays. I've been poor for so long, they are just a reminder of all the unbought presents I haven't been able to give friends. I am so disheartened by the poverty if I was not disabled I would leave American society to move to another country or join an alternative lifestyle within our countries borders--like Christian community or something. I feel like I live on the edges of a world I simply do not fit in. Sorry you went through that too.

      I don't have the tech skills yet to get it online. I am even trying to figure out how I would copy it for a pin money situation. It's not done yet, but still working on it. I wish I was not so slow but I was inking yesterday afternoon.

      Thanks for the link. :)

  5. I hear you! I always felt guilty hating the holidays due to my own poverty but misery loves company. No more guilt! At least we have Thanksgiving, which isn't the overcommercialized greed-fest that Christmas has become. It does sound like you have some skills though -- try posting your comics online.
    Why the HE!! would that a$$hat be suing YOU? He ran into YOUR parked car. He must be a psychopath. Or desperate.
    I know exactly how you feel about the endles bills coming when the well is dry. Hang in there, Peep.

    1. Thanks anon. I do Thanksgiving but stopped celebrating Christmas in 2003.

      To be frank it is a relief. I do some holiday cards with happy new year on them or bible verses for my friends. {still believe what is written in book of Luke but do not believe Dec 25 is any special day}

      Check this out..

      Saturnalia is a giant greed fest. I think more people even for secular reasons should ditch it, less stress, no more pressure. Buy your kid if you have one a few presents on Sept 18 or April 2 so they don't miss it. I wonder if the guy suing us has personality disorders or something else going on. Wonder if there is a history of nuisance lawsuits? Yes I am tired of these bills. I'm too sick to go live in a camper or take to couch surfing. I think I would have already if I didn't sleep on a hospital bed, need perfect temps to breathe, and had a CPAP and Flexitouch machine and medical equipment to maintain LOL. I don't think homeless types can find a plug for the CPAP too easy. :P Well we have kept the biggies paid, there is just nothing left for much fun. I have generous friends who have helped me with food, dresses and other things, that takes the edge of the pain off. I plan to go to the library tomorrow and free art museum when it warms up.