Tuesday, March 3, 2015
"Narc Madness: The Narcissist Therapist & Facebook"
Ollie is right that "most therapists" still don't get it." I agree about how short the sessions are, and as soon as you warm up you are out the door. I have been in therapy some have been good some have been bad, but I have a deep concern about narcissism. This was written about on other articles, but the psychology world is kind of failing in warning people about narcissism and sociopathy. If you show up as a CPTSD child abuse victim and ACON, only very few therapists will even understand how to address those traumas. Maybe in the past ten years this has gotten better but one still needs to be wary.The personality disordered may even be in the field themselves.
Of course being a Christian, I do not agree with everything in psychotherapy, though I've had a few Christian therapists along the way. Ollie is right to warn people in being careful on being careful Facebook boards and online groups. We have to be careful predators can enter those places. Some know that some ACONs are vulnerable people especially in the early stages of identification of the problem and breaking away.
It is interesting how he points out how narcissists will use narcissism as a "shield" since it is a personality disorder. Some people believe that malignant narcissists can be "cured", I do not hold such hope even if these people are well-meaning folks. There is part of us who would love for everyone to be good people and to have consciences.
He is right about some of the support boards being full of personality disorders especially borderline personality disorder where disordered people expect others to cater them. There are a few"safe" small boards but even there, and if you find one, be happy for it, but if certain psychologists, psychiatrists, ,"professionals" and personality disordered are there, be careful. He gives good advice, in walking on and just staying away from people that don't treat you right. We have to carry the rule of "no contact" with the toxic into all arenas.
See: My Counselors and Me
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I agree it is exactly this way with therapists, they don't understand. They once tried to diagnose me, and said it was like I was always on the alert that I spent my whole life sitting on a grenade that was ready to go off. That I was worse than a soldier of war. The therapist didn't know what caused this, so therefore tried to treat me anyway. And nothing really helped. My problems were too intrinsic, so much a part of me, she should have diagnosed me as ACON as I never developed properly due to traumatic formative years. Sigh, it is an embarrassment they haven't figured this stuff out yet.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the rest of what he's saying here in this video is right. I too, believe that it is hopeless to cure the MN.
I got diagnosed with PTSD by so many of them but none really got to the core root of the problem. I didn't even know what was wrong essentially thought I told them all I had severe abuse growing up. I feel many lack training in trauma or what can bring it about. I think the ACON world except for a few specialist is wa y too ignored. Yes I agree with the video very much and I think attempts to "cure" narcissists is a path that will go nowhere and only open the "healer" to predators.
DeleteAnd that was the best therapist that there was. She had a stellar reputation and about the kindest heart I ever met.
DeleteI found I was traumatized, but from what? I had a good childhood, everything from my perspective was good. But once I entered the world of ACON's that wonderful childhood fell apart and real memories started to happen.
So in the beginning of Ollie's video where he is explaining that he is only telling his story was the most powerful for me.
Even my best therapist didn't tell me to get away from the family. She was kind, knew about Aspergers, back then she had to discuss heavy issues with me, I almost died in 2001, so I still ask "how didn't she know"? Part of me understands that back then talking about these disorders wasn't as wide spread. Maybe they still saw narcissists controllable with "boundaries". I know some people do consider their childhoods "good" or normal" some go into denial to rescue their minds. I understand where you are coming from on that. Even I denied the total evil to a point, telling myself, "they have to really love me, they are just "bad" at showing it". I agree about Ollie's video.
DeleteI've had therapist say to me that my parents just didn't know any better.. Oh yes they did. Or they would have been treating everyone that way..
ReplyDeleteI had a therapist 15yrs ago who taught family systems at a local school and he never mentioned the subject. It baffles me to this day...
I've seen narcissistic therapist they exist in droves . Be very careful. They come of as very caring at first..
Therapists SERIOUSLY need more training on narcissism, sociopathy and child abuse. I heard that "She did the best she could" line too even from those who admitted I had been severely emotionally and otherwise abused. The therapists are trained too for reconcilation and the denial of total evil. Yes the narc ones are dangerous.
DeleteOh, yes ,the denial of evil really bugs me. As if the person just made a little mistake that did not leave total wreckage!
ReplyDeleteBut I also think some therapists don't understand because it has never happened to them. And people don't want to see that people can be evil and deliberately manipulate someone.
ReplyDeleteI agree. Therapists who had normal loving families aren't going to get it. Some can't even accept sociopaths and narcs in their reality. They don't want to see it. I had therapists where there was massive class differences--they were middle class and above and did not understand me whatsoever.
DeleteI agree. Therapists who had normal loving families aren't going to get it. Some can't even accept sociopaths and narcs in their reality. They don't want to see it. I had therapists where there was massive class differences--they were middle class and above and did not understand me whatsoever.
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