"Shirley [not her real name] is so needy I avoided her!"
I said to this person, "Who told you Shirley was needy?"
"I know who it was, it was the would be narcissist I walked away from. She put down that woman for years. Why do you believe everything that person tells you?. Everyone else was always a loser, a failure, a hoarder, needy, wrong and bad according to that person. They are STILL doing it to their favored targets from what I can tell too!"
"When this narcissist told me about Shirley I thought her husband had died 10 or 20 years ago, she was so offended by her outpourings of grief. She would tell me things like "She won't move on". I suppose human emotions offend the personality disordered. Well I looked up Shirley online, and found out her husband had died only 18 months before, before I heard these complaints. What kind of person disses another for having natural grief and losing a husband they had a home and two children with?"
Oh I was angry I laid it out. The person I talked to conceded that it was good to hear other viewpoints, but I was still bothered. They may read what I have written here. I don't care. There's nothing to lose. If Shirley is still getting it years later, so am I. Some of us need to stick up for the underdog. Why not me?
I wish I had added too, "What's wrong with being needy?" Some people do face loneliness. When people reject them it just adds to the cycle.