Books Recommended for Autistic Women

Book Recommendations for Autistic Women

The Gaugin Connection – Estelle Ryan
nonfiction book about an autistic art insurance investigator.
not the best writing, but nice for representation.

Thinking in Pictures – Dr. Temple Grandin
Grandin presents her life & mind.

[I read this one, she is a much more spatial/mathematical thinker then I am, I sometimes wonder if Grandin has Kanner's Syndrome, the subset of autism, where connection to other humans is not so desired, Aspies like me miss it if we don't have it and yearn for it. One thing her "thinking in pictures" applies to me. I don't always think in words but in pictures and sensations. ]

Asperger’s on the Inside – Michelle Vines
Vines’ memoir.

The Autistic Brain – Dr. Temple Grandin
Grandin explores recent research & gives advice.

[This book was interesting. It is kind of technical on medical things. I disagreed with some of her hard-edged stuff regarding careers. I am not sure every Aspie is going to find the same degree of career success. She is right Aspies need to work hard and try their best but not every Aspie has the same physical health or family support. I think she is naive about some of the social demands put on Aspies in the workplace, where people without super-star skills, may not be able to wind their way through so easily]

The Highly Sensitive Person – Dr. Elaine Aron
Recommended to be post-Dx, 

[I read this one years ago. It kind of triggered me. I remember feeling over-stimulated by the book which probably wasn't her intention. One thing in life, I have dealt with is making myself less sensitive so I am not crying all the time. It did have some information on dealing with anxiety and seemed to be honest about how a complex world seemed to overtake me. Of course it would take years to realize my hyper-vigilance was born out of severe narcissistic abuse, then a natural born tendency. Of course Aspergers plays a role in anxiety, but no contact reduced my numbers of panic attacks so much, it was amazing.]

22 Things A Woman With Asperger’s Syndrome Wants Her Partner To Know – Rudy Simone
Read this with my partner & it helped us discover strategies to better support one another.


[I skimmed this one at a book store, was too poor to buy it. I always saw myself as married to a fellow Aspie anyway but one therapist told me he is just very intelligent and not an Aspie. She agreed with my diagnosis. He can talk to people far more comfortably then me though.

The book seemed more geared to AS and NT partnerships. I don't think I would have lasted with a typical NT though.  They probably would have bored me to death. Do normal couples sit around discussing history and politics? He just came in my bedroom to tell me about a book he is reading about global warming called "The Water Will Come". I asked him "What large American cities are on the list?" He said, "New York". That's a bit worrisome. I did research global warming and changed my mind on it, I read scientific descriptions and finally figured out what they meant. It's happening.]

All the Weight of our Dreams – Brown/Ashkenazy/Onaiwu
Re: the intersection of race & autism. Racialized & pathologized bodies like mine.

Bittersweet on the Autism Spectrum – anthology
A lovely read. Various & individual perspectives/stories/paths.

I am AspienWoman – Tania A. Marshall
Shows profiles of several successful adult autistic women. Great for self-esteem, planning, & motivation.

Pretending to be Normal – Liane Holliday Willey
Memoir on late-diagnosis. 

[She got diagnosed as an adult. Well I did too, but at least this told me this had happened to others. She does have some flowery language I had a hard time grasping and she seemed higher functioning with children and a career, so I didn't relate to all of the book. I think she does have Aspergers, it's just not as severe as mine, and she had diagnostic end notes that helped me.]

Women and Girls with Autism Spectrum Disorder – Sarah Hendrickx
Sarah researched autism from the outside looking in. Then she was diagnosed herself. 

Nerdy, Shy, and Socially Inappropriate – Cynthia Kim
Based off her blog, a memoir on late-diagnosis & coming to terms with it. Highly recommend.

[love the title on this one want to read this one]

Aspergirls – Rudy Simone
Very popular & relatable but read it in chunks because it can get quite heavy. 

[This one is the best, I wish I could afford a copy for everyone I want to understand me. She sums up my life. I loved one section where they talked about aging with Aspergers. I think that is a topic that needs explored more in depth.]

Odd Girl Out – Laura James
So relatable I had to take breaks to cry & process. Beautiful.

The Empath’s Survival Guide – Dr. Judith Orloff
Recommended to me post-Dx. Incredibly affirming, validating, and helpful.

[I read this one years ago. I don't consider myself an empath. I know some ACONs do but when it comes to nurturing and comforting people, I'm the biggest stumbler and bumbler out there. I did used to have people come and use me as a counselor, but I think that may have been more bad boundaries on my part then any would be skill in it.]

Asperger’s and Self-Esteem – Norm Ledgin
Great examples of wonderful achievements done by autistics.

Neurotribes – Steve Silberman
*not pictured but absolutely necessary read for everyone before they speak about autism. Steve gives an overview of the history of the concept of autism.

[I definitely want to read the ones I haven't yet.]