When I was into conspiracy theory, I encountered people who believed they were "gang stalked" or "targeted persons". Some of them were paranoid, or paranoid schizophrenics especially the ones keeping track of what color cars followed them or that there was special meaning in license plates. Mental illness came with the delusions of hearing voices, being watched, or followed. Others with lives permanently trapped on the "hard setting" sought explanations for why their life had gone astray ignoring the built injustice to our society that can push a person further and further down where there's a punishment around every corner.
However with lots of things, there can be truth too behind the stories. There's definitely stories of whistleblowers, who have had their lives messed with. People facing down megacorporate interests or the powerful who notice their lives crumbling apart especially when they were standing against corruption.
A friend into conspiracy send me this video. I told them, this
video was interesting to me, outside the conspiracy stuff I take with a grain of salt. I warned them, there's false parts of this video where people who have real mental health concerns would have them worsen. I don't know if scalar technology is real, I don't know if they can send people radiation burning them. I can see some mentally ill people being taken too far down the conspiracy rabbit hole. One magazine article points out how we are all targeted individuals with the constant tracking via computers. So this can be a complex issues.
Yes some mentally ill people do take this stuff to extreme. Some of the conspiracy websites get crazy where they talk about gangstalking and schizophrenics talking about 20 red cars following them and delusional and schizoaffective patterns. Aunt Confused talked all the time about the mafia pursuing her. So be mindful here, even the narcissists themselves can claim being targeted.
Gang stalking and targeted person is a term most often used the conspiracy community and elsewhere, but it has been proven as being done to various whistleblowers etc. Like people who leave cults, who get tracked down by them, there's a lot of overlap with scapegoating and how narcissistic families target ACONs and try to sabotage careers, relationships and more in the background. There is a spectrum where there is out right life destruction, criminal harrassment to those who may just face emotional abuse. Yeah they try to drive people crazy or try to ruin their lives. Smear campaigns are a giant tool in the tool box.
Everyone who has been victimized by a narcissist or sociopath however knows they have been made targets to an extent. I wrote the conspiracy friend and told them, if you have a malignant narcissist or sociopath in your life or had one or more then one, then you are a target to a certain extent. Narcissists STALK. I told them them to be careful of taking things too far, where you see every random event as having meaning and go deeper into paranoia. Americans need to return to critical thinking. Conspiracy beliefs can lead to some negative places. However if you were the family scapegoat, smear campaigns alone can cause great harm. ACONS know that targeting is REAL.
You have to go no contact, and no contact means, cutting off all their minions. Many scapegoats discover as I did, that family friends, friends from high school 30-40 years back are not safe. Many ACONS who go no contact realize the only way to go into a free life is to completely clean the slate. Until I cleaned out my life with anyone who had connection to them, it left a vulnerability. Even with the VLC cousins, my contact is limited to Christmas cards and a once a year or every two years, "hello". These cousins who were the children of the aunt who loved me, are better people but sadly still have intermittent although rare contact with my abusers. This means I will remain very low contact as long as certain parties are involved in their lives.
Life became much more peaceful for me during my years of no contact. I don't care what they do or don't do. I just want left alone. Many narcissists turn with time to easier targets or choose new scapegoats especially if you have kept your no contact wall intact. That said, I do think scapegoats have to remain mindful and vigilant to a certain point for the rest of their lives. Being too trusting, and not realizing how these people work, can work against an ACON. Many of us were told growing up to always give the benefit of the doubt and to be too trusting. We were told to ignore our own intuition and to give everyone else a break while not protecting ourselves. To succeed an ACON must learn self protection.
I have known ACONs where their sociopaths have gone on full gangstalking campaigns. I have met ACONS who have been committed against their will and others caught up in legal battles. Some of these folks were even NO CONTACT for YEARS prior. For me their lives and experiences have served as a warning. Live your life, do your thing, be happy, but keep a level of caution. These people are never to be trusted.
Some ACONs get hoovered even 5 and 6 years into their no contact and beyond. Some have had legal machinations and one can read about those who have had their narcissists go so far to get them committed. Connected narcissists can use government and legal branches to make their targets miserable, destroy lives, mess with wills and probate, and other nasty plans. Many can easily find co-narcissists in multiple establishments to help them carry out their dirty work. Wealthy narcissists have more resources at their disposal to abuse. Sadly in our corrupt society, mask wearing narcissists are more often believed. They can get other narcissists or flying monkeys to join in on their plans. We do live in a narcissistic supportive society where they can play martyrs and be believed very easily.
Here too, an ex-scapegoat may face down, the fact that being an empath standing for love and truth, can make one a target, and you learn with time and boundaries, that you don't owe the world or narcissists who have abused you for years, your time and attention any further. You shut some of that down and learn not to let people "invade". You learn to build the walls of boundaries. You stop the enmeshment and the false love and "forgive and forget" crap that made you vulnerable over and over.
False guilt too is a weight on the ACON's back that can keep them in the game too long, as the world will tell you that you are "unforgiving" or "mean" to "cut your family off. Learning detachement is a definite asset. You figure narcissists are going to narc but it doesn't matter anymore. I know in this world learning to protect yourself can take some time. We have to reengage our intuition to learn who is an enemy and who is a friend and who is neutral.
One thing I had to face was the total nexus of disrespect, and I faced facts I wanted a life of respect even if this meant having "no family" and in many ways I did not have a family outside of my loving husband. The me of today is sickened by how little regard they held me in as I went crawling like a puppy dog to beg for their crumbs. I forgive myself too because I knew no better and had been trained and needed to find the path to a new life.
In my family they were alike in ways I recognized as I exited, deadened down emotions, shutting off emotions, shutting off guilt, playing to win, caring most about appearances, I noticed all these traits in them and didn't want to be associated with them anymore anyhow. I realized I had become someone else. They don't even know the me of today. Let your absence be your witness.
As for the Conspiracy level targeting? Some perhaps are paranoid, and being led into mental illness. America as a whole seems to be descending into a religious fueled fear based insanity crushed by corruption. However for the ACON being paranoid is having all the facts on certain levels. Don't be too trusting. Build your life around safe people who have shown themselves to be empathetic and kind. This changed my life for the better on multiple fronts. Avoid all narcissists, their minions or anyone connected to them. Keep yourself safe, and listen to your intuition. They really will sink as low as your imagination will guess. That said, your life is still yours to live, and the more time you are away, the better it will become.
Targeted by Narcissists?
Yes some mentally ill people do take this stuff to extreme. Some of the conspiracy websites get crazy where they talk about gangstalking and schizophrenics talking about 20 red cars following them and delusional and schizoaffective patterns. Aunt Confused talked all the time about the mafia pursuing her. So be mindful here, even the narcissists themselves can claim being targeted.
Gang stalking and targeted person is a term most often used the conspiracy community and elsewhere, but it has been proven as being done to various whistleblowers etc. Like people who leave cults, who get tracked down by them, there's a lot of overlap with scapegoating and how narcissistic families target ACONs and try to sabotage careers, relationships and more in the background. There is a spectrum where there is out right life destruction, criminal harrassment to those who may just face emotional abuse. Yeah they try to drive people crazy or try to ruin their lives. Smear campaigns are a giant tool in the tool box.
Everyone who has been victimized by a narcissist or sociopath however knows they have been made targets to an extent. I wrote the conspiracy friend and told them, if you have a malignant narcissist or sociopath in your life or had one or more then one, then you are a target to a certain extent. Narcissists STALK. I told them them to be careful of taking things too far, where you see every random event as having meaning and go deeper into paranoia. Americans need to return to critical thinking. Conspiracy beliefs can lead to some negative places. However if you were the family scapegoat, smear campaigns alone can cause great harm. ACONS know that targeting is REAL.
You have to go no contact, and no contact means, cutting off all their minions. Many scapegoats discover as I did, that family friends, friends from high school 30-40 years back are not safe. Many ACONS who go no contact realize the only way to go into a free life is to completely clean the slate. Until I cleaned out my life with anyone who had connection to them, it left a vulnerability. Even with the VLC cousins, my contact is limited to Christmas cards and a once a year or every two years, "hello". These cousins who were the children of the aunt who loved me, are better people but sadly still have intermittent although rare contact with my abusers. This means I will remain very low contact as long as certain parties are involved in their lives.
Life became much more peaceful for me during my years of no contact. I don't care what they do or don't do. I just want left alone. Many narcissists turn with time to easier targets or choose new scapegoats especially if you have kept your no contact wall intact. That said, I do think scapegoats have to remain mindful and vigilant to a certain point for the rest of their lives. Being too trusting, and not realizing how these people work, can work against an ACON. Many of us were told growing up to always give the benefit of the doubt and to be too trusting. We were told to ignore our own intuition and to give everyone else a break while not protecting ourselves. To succeed an ACON must learn self protection.
I have known ACONs where their sociopaths have gone on full gangstalking campaigns. I have met ACONS who have been committed against their will and others caught up in legal battles. Some of these folks were even NO CONTACT for YEARS prior. For me their lives and experiences have served as a warning. Live your life, do your thing, be happy, but keep a level of caution. These people are never to be trusted.
Some ACONs get hoovered even 5 and 6 years into their no contact and beyond. Some have had legal machinations and one can read about those who have had their narcissists go so far to get them committed. Connected narcissists can use government and legal branches to make their targets miserable, destroy lives, mess with wills and probate, and other nasty plans. Many can easily find co-narcissists in multiple establishments to help them carry out their dirty work. Wealthy narcissists have more resources at their disposal to abuse. Sadly in our corrupt society, mask wearing narcissists are more often believed. They can get other narcissists or flying monkeys to join in on their plans. We do live in a narcissistic supportive society where they can play martyrs and be believed very easily.
Here too, an ex-scapegoat may face down, the fact that being an empath standing for love and truth, can make one a target, and you learn with time and boundaries, that you don't owe the world or narcissists who have abused you for years, your time and attention any further. You shut some of that down and learn not to let people "invade". You learn to build the walls of boundaries. You stop the enmeshment and the false love and "forgive and forget" crap that made you vulnerable over and over.
False guilt too is a weight on the ACON's back that can keep them in the game too long, as the world will tell you that you are "unforgiving" or "mean" to "cut your family off. Learning detachement is a definite asset. You figure narcissists are going to narc but it doesn't matter anymore. I know in this world learning to protect yourself can take some time. We have to reengage our intuition to learn who is an enemy and who is a friend and who is neutral.
One thing I had to face was the total nexus of disrespect, and I faced facts I wanted a life of respect even if this meant having "no family" and in many ways I did not have a family outside of my loving husband. The me of today is sickened by how little regard they held me in as I went crawling like a puppy dog to beg for their crumbs. I forgive myself too because I knew no better and had been trained and needed to find the path to a new life.
In my family they were alike in ways I recognized as I exited, deadened down emotions, shutting off emotions, shutting off guilt, playing to win, caring most about appearances, I noticed all these traits in them and didn't want to be associated with them anymore anyhow. I realized I had become someone else. They don't even know the me of today. Let your absence be your witness.
As for the Conspiracy level targeting? Some perhaps are paranoid, and being led into mental illness. America as a whole seems to be descending into a religious fueled fear based insanity crushed by corruption. However for the ACON being paranoid is having all the facts on certain levels. Don't be too trusting. Build your life around safe people who have shown themselves to be empathetic and kind. This changed my life for the better on multiple fronts. Avoid all narcissists, their minions or anyone connected to them. Keep yourself safe, and listen to your intuition. They really will sink as low as your imagination will guess. That said, your life is still yours to live, and the more time you are away, the better it will become.
Targeted by Narcissists?
Wow, I agree with you peeps. Watching the video made my skin crawl. It was over the top. Where's the solution?
ReplyDeleteI think what happens with me is that when I'm stressed I don't ignore the crazies but try to reason with them or are pulled into a nutty interaction. I think the main thing is to not engage with people who try to start verbal fights. To walk away or go in another direction until they're gone. I can't always do that though.
Gangstalking is real. Groups of people who sit on steps or porches all day long waiting for their drug dealer or dealing drugs themselves really have boring lives. Talking about their non customer is their form of entertainment. I met a woman who told me she never speaks to anyone in her building. Never -because it's all old women who sit outside the building by the entrance and want to know her business.
I made the mistake of speaking with a step sitter who came at me in a nearby store. I engaged and they kept asking me questions, I had to say twice, I'm not comfortable with you asking me questions. Later on, I realized that I shouldn't have wasted my breath. Being polite to them is a major mistake. They're not being polite to me, demanding information to me. Best to go gray rock and not have a conversation with them.
It's hard, I agree. I have pretended to be completely deaf before, well in reality when some people come blathering at me, I often can't understood what is being said anyway. One time a person I could tell had very negative intentions, I told them, I am deaf and cannot hear you and walked away. I am autistic enough to loathe someone I don't know approaching me. It is better to ignore and disengage and get away if you can too. I do think gangstalking is real, I do believe the paranoid angles like the people who talk about having their thoughts read etc, can be used to discredit whistleblowers and scapegoats who are having people mess with them. Of course there are the mentally ill too in this mix. It can get complex. There are dysfunctional people or ones as you mention in the drug trade who go looking for trouble or drama or chaos where ever they can find it. I am polite to neighbors but have a general rule not to befriend or get close to any. It's too much trouble if they turn on you or they go gossiping to landlords or building managers. There's some neighbors I know the names of but I keep things polite and kind, but I don't want bosom friendships, that can be a danger zone, like befriending people at work. What if the friendship goes badly? yeah some people can be the targets of gossip, and they will ask nosy questions. Us ex-scapegoats know that many narcissists will utilize flying monkeys to do interrogation to drum up any intel they can use against you or gossip about or build on to smear. I agree about grey rocking.
DeleteI've gotten into so much trouble befriending coworkers and neighbors. Was shocked when they turned on me, using anything I said against me. Yes, polite, neutral, brief conversation with the above works best. Some, best to not speak with at all!!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you about the mental health issues - that video was way too much for me.
yes it's safer to avoid close friendships with neighbors and coworkers. There's love bombers out there who will feign friendship to turn on you especially in the work place. Yes keep things polite and neutral and the less personal information the better.
DeleteSad, right? But that's how it is these days.
DeletePeep,
ReplyDeleteI went through something similar when I moved to the same town as my family, after having lived away from them for five years. It was the most surreal thing I've ever encountered, and changed me in ways I can not describe in words. I will never be the same.
My life was normal in terms of living within a community up to moving back to the same town. Never had any problems, came and went as I pleased. No issues with anyone, really.
Within a month of me and my husband moving back, my NM started in right away on sharing these crazy stories (crying to me, so upset) that were supposedly happening to her within the town, and she had a complete narrative and culprits (step-family) who started this slander campaign against her. But later, I figured out that this was her just priming me for what would start happening to me. She had to get me to notice things, to pay attention to my surroundings, to become hyper-vigilant, to eventually control my thoughts and actions.
NM had always come to me like a parent to protect her. This started when I was around 10, telling me she feared my father would kill her and make it look like an accident and the like, and it very much rattled me to my core. I was a young child with an impressionable mind, and this was emotional abuse because NONE OF IT was true in reality. At the same time, she is spreading her stories/lies about me, and my father was very distant and cold to me my whole life. Then as I got older, I noticed more and more people staying away from me. She had to always know my friends' parents, then my own friends when I was in college - such unhealthy emeshment.
I've had people in the same town come up and say inappropriate things, spit at me, follow me on foot and car, then my neighbors became cold and hateful. It was traumatizing all the while I was running to her a total mess, then she would call me "paranoid" to my face, and behind my back. Oh, the irony.
I think her best friend started this, or gave my Nm the idea. I know my NS was also behind it, backing everything NM says to validate her her sadistic tendencies. Her best friend's husband was a retired police captain, and
knew a lot of people.
I think my NM told some sad, brutal story about me like she did to me about my father, something horrible I'm sure. If I lost my mind by their "gang stalking" tactics, surely my amazing, successful husband would leave me, and their false narrative would become reality.
Thankfully, my husband witness some strange things himself, and we surmised it was them, that there is no gov't conspiracy. It's just plain old gas lighting, emotional and psychologically bullying by sociopaths. It really is evil. I felt I was given to wolves by my own Nm,Ns, and anyone else in the know.
Will continue....
I believe you anon, sociopaths cause enough damage. I had family friends and extended people who even hated me because of my mother's lies. if she ever even just MET someone, they were turned against me. The only exceptions in my life are my husband, and his best friend--friend of mine. Even my college friends chose my mother. The exfriend who was millionaire even was there for her verbal abuse and cold treatment and still took up for her. I will never understand that, except fellow narcissists identify with other narcissists.
DeleteI know my name would have been made mud if I ever lived in any of the same towns my mother did. I had someone smearing my name here for a time [the project ex friend] and noticing things vastly improving after they moved away, so these things do happen.
I warn ACONs, don't live in any of the same town as narc relatives if you can help it especially small towns. I know how provincial small towns can get, thankfully small ones I've lived in, no relatives lived in.
I saw people who had their names dirtied because they did something at 20 who were 45 years old, things just got absurd, now put in a narc whose smearing your name for decades in a geographical area.
I lived fine away from the narcissists too, no problems etc. I do worry some of my liberal protesting here, could be earning me some ire in some circles especially in a very religious and conservative town, I noticed since I did a prochoice protest, there's been a couple acquaintances steering clear, but these are risks I take. At least here, I have contact with the small liberal community to bolster me.
Oh I am sure your NM told those stories and repeated your crimes to everyone in the town. When I peeled the onion, wondering why so many people hated me or treated me badly, I could trace a lot back to smear campaigns. She told all these people I was crazy. The only reason I even got employed after college, was I found work, where she had no connections, and was in the poor and predominantly black school district as a sub, where again she had no connections, so that's how I worked around things. Don't think you're paranoid if people are treating you different in the town you live in with your narcs. You lived just fine elsewhere. These people can damage reputations.
What she did regarding your father was severe abuse, parental alienation garbage and very evil.
Yeah mine had to KNOW everyone including friend's parents, it is crazy, she has contact even with EXs and Ex BOYFRIENdS AND GIRLFRIENDS, of various family members. It's all about that web of control.
I figured out fast while even neighbors, family friends and others, ignored me or simply did not like me. Again if she met them or knew them, she got them to see me in a certain light.
Yeah you are getting the smear campaign outcomes. It's horrible. People believe the stories. I bet she's telling them things you never would imagine. Yes they will gaslight to the hilt while they carry out smear campaigns, when I was a teen, crying about why doesn't anyone like me...they will claim you are "paranoid" or it is all your fault.
I know you lost your faith in God, and can understand how such an experience can do that to someone. I recall having dreams, very real dreams, that showed me who was behind what I was experiencing. Up until this point, I was running to my enemy for help.
ReplyDeleteHere's the dream I had, which felt more like a warning: I was inside of her house. My brother and his family were at her front door, leaving. He had gone NC 6 yrs at this point. He asked me to go with them, but seeing our M quite agitated, I decided to stay with her in the house as they left and shut the door. I stayed b/c I loved her, and wanted to comfort her.
Dream continues: Just then, my agitated, looking to start a fight, NM started yelling at me in a total rage. I told her, "I don't have to stay here. I have my own family at home (just had a child)." Then when I went to turn to leave, I felt pulled back, and fell on the floor. She jumped on top of me, saying something I couldn't make out, almost like an evil chant. She was laughing. I looked up and saw my father, who had already passed away, sitting over me in a chair. His body was there, but he flickered like a hologram projector. It was obvious he couldn't help me. As my NM, laughed, chanted, face so twisted with evil, only inches away from my face, my vision was going black as if I was dying, or about to die. Then I awoke out of my bed, breathing hard, and realize it was a dream.
But I took that dream as a warning from God. I had two choices - leave like my brother, or stay, and die in some way. This dream was March 2011, and I went NC, pretty much, by early '12.
I also prayed to God in one of our guest bedrooms one night, on my face, crying. I was pregnant with my second child. This was one month after that scary dream. I prayed that God would move us far away, don't know how or when, just get us out of here. There was just a deep dread I can't explain. Two months later, my husband was offered a job, which I thought he would never accept, that would take us far away from there. The move to the new town was not perfect. I was miserable there - gloomy, rained a lot, people were not friendly. But I had a feeling we were going to move to a big City, and two months later, my husband got a job in one of the biggest cities in the world.
One last memory, I remember when we were still in that town with family, someone ringing the doorbell during a blinding storm (thunder/lighting). It was around 8:30 -9pm. It was our front door. Everyone, who knew us well, always went to our back/side door. Always brave, I walked to the front hallway from the kitchen to open the front door, when I felt something stop me in my spirit. It was blocking me from the front door. I went to the dining room, and tried to look outside but everything was blurry due to the heavy rains. We lived on a culdasac in a private home development so this person was not a stranded motorist needing help. This person came for a purpose as who stands uncovered in a blinding thunder storm at 9pm at night without a reason?
We had pumpkins lining our front staircase, and when I looked again, I saw someone carrying 2 pumpkins away to their car parked in the street. This was confirmed the next morning when our 4 pumpkins were down to 2 pumpkins. So whoever was there that night did not have good intentions.
But this is what makes malignant narcissists and sociopaths so dangerous, their ability to brainwash others to do things, evil things, they would not do themselves. Whoever that was, I can tell you was someway linked to my NM and her enablers.
I literally felt something pure and divine stop me in that hallway like there was a hand up and I couldn't walk past it.
This is real evil, and anyone touched by it will never be the same again. I don't know why I was targeted by my NM/NS. I truly loved them with my whole being once. But today, I stay away b/c they are not to be trusted again.
In the words of Coraline - "Be wise, be brave, be tricky."
I wrote you another post but it got lost. I am glad you did not answer your door that night! Do not put anything past malignant narcissists or sociopaths. The book "The Gift of Fear" provides a lot of great warnings. Most of them will sink to whatever levels you can imagine or not even imagine! Like you I knew I had to get out to literally STAY ALIVE. I do think encountering evil does change a person, thanks for understanding that piece.
Delete